A split screen, on the left a photograph of guest, Marianne Slater, doing some gardening and on the right a photograph of a neat and tidy crafting workshop

Episode 198 – Crafting the perfect workshop with Marianne Slater

If you’re a creative clutterbug you’re not on your own. Today we are talking to Marianne Slater. She’s a floral designer and self confessed ‘stuff’ addict. But she’s making great strides in her decluttering journey and is going to tell us her secrets.

Prefer to read rather than listen?

Transcript of this podcast episode

[00:00:00] Lesley: Are you a creative clutter bug? You're not on your own. Today we are talking to the lovely Marianne Slater. She's a floral designer and self-confessed stuff addict, but she's making fantastic strides on her decluttering journey, and today she's going to share her secrets.

[00:00:16] Now I am very excited, always excited, but very, very excited today to chat to one of our members, Marianne. Every member has a different story to tell, and there were a couple of things that stood out to me when seeing Marianne's journey unfold. So firstly, she's young. I. Compared to me and recognizes that some of her traits were there from a very early age.

[00:00:37] And secondly, she's super creative and we all know that often creativity and clutter go hand in hand. Now, Mariana's created a workshop for her floral business that made all our members swoon when we saw the photos in our forum. Later in the podcast, we're going to talk all about that workshop projects and how she made it happen.

[00:00:55] But first of all, we're going to delve into Marianne's early life. Welcome, Marianne. 

[00:01:00] Marianne: Hello. 

[00:01:01] Lesley: Thank you for having me. Pleasure. And if you're watching on YouTube, you'll be able to see uh, Marianne's beautiful floral displays behind her. It looks gorgeous. It's so nice to see you. And thank you for deciding to be on YouTube as well, Marianne.

[00:01:12] And to go public, go on video. As I said, that's probably 'cause you are young and lovely. So tell us a little bit about, not that young actually, but tell us a little bit about your early life and your upbringing and what made you into. A stuff addict. Your word's not mine. 

[00:01:28] Marianne: A stuff addict. Yes. I did use that, didn't I?

[00:01:31] Um, I've just always been a creative person and I grew up in a lovely house in the countryside, um, and it was, it's a big enough house to have lots of things, so that's what I had. I. I collected paper and pencils and anything I could get my hands on to be creative with was sort of where it all started.

[00:01:56] Um, and I was always encouraged to do that because my parents are both really creative and anything I wanted to do, you know, was always encouraged. Um, yeah, so the house was always. Uh, not full. That's, I don't want to do disservice to my parents 'cause they, you know, obviously kept a lovely home. But, um, there were always projects.

[00:02:15] There were always little bits here and there, and I think my mother and I definitely tend to be quite sentimental people as well. So that's a whole other, that's a whole of the story, isn't it? Being sentimental, but yes. Um, yeah. So, I grew up here, which is where my studio is. So 

[00:02:33] Lesley: before we go on, Marianne, you talk about growing up in the countryside.

[00:02:36] Whereabouts is your countryside? Where, where do you come from? 

[00:02:40] Marianne: Uh, we're in the north of England. Uh, peak district in Darbyshire. If people know that, um, very near Bakewell and Chatsworth house. And, uh, the Plague Village of eam. Yeah. Sort of that part, 

[00:02:55] Lesley: the world. Oh, wow. Yeah. You say the Plague Village of eam, which sounds quite, which just sounds dark, which it is.

[00:03:01] But honestly, year of Wonders, which is set in eam, is one of my favorite ever books. Now we're going off track here, but if nobody's read it, if you haven't read Year of Wonders, it is set in eam, which is really close to where Marianne's from. It's a fabulous, fabulous book, but I digress. As always Marianne.

[00:03:16] So tell us a little bit more. So you, you grew up in an idyllic part of the peak district in England mm-hmm. With your mom and 

[00:03:22] Marianne: dad? Yeah. And then I, I went to school nearby. I went to college to study art. Surprise, surprise. And then I ended up going to university in Leeds also to study art. So yeah. And that's when the, uh, the clutter really began to build up, because I had.

[00:03:44] So many projects I was doing, there were all these resources that I wanted to work on and. When you live in a, when you live in a tiny house share or well hall at the beginning and then in a few house shares and you have one bedroom, and I was used to just, you know, having my stuff all over my parents' house if I wanted it to.

[00:04:07] Or I could go out in a garden or I could do what I wanted. And now I was confined to this quite small, you know, quite small rooms. If you've seen a student house, you know that it's not exactly the lap of luxury. And yeah, I. I ended up just filling all rooms to the rafters, and I was known as the, the messy one with my friends.

[00:04:30] And, you know, people would come in my room and go, oh God, what, what's going on in here? Like, it looked, it looks like a bomb's gone off. And I would just sort of pass it away. Like, whoa, I'm an art student. I'm creative. This is what I've, it's got to be like. But I think that's probably the first time I, I started to realize like, Oh, I've got a bit of a stuff problem 'cause it was just coming in.

[00:04:53] Nothing went out. Nothing went out. I would, you know, you could, you could gimme a train ticket and I'd be like, Ooh. A memory could be for a project. I mean, I did do an art project based on train tickets once because, You know, it's an interesting subject. So yeah, it all just got very out of hand at university, to be honest.

[00:05:12] So 

[00:05:12] Lesley: you say that you were known as the messy person. So do you think that that's the first time that the realization hit you that actually not everybody lived in this way and not everybody had a a, an accumulation of stuff along the way? 

[00:05:27] Marianne: I think, I think it's been a very long journey into realizing that part of it.

[00:05:31] I think there, I, there was, I felt embarrassed. I mean, that's the first thing I started to feel like there was a bit of a, a shame around it. Like I was, yeah, maybe I did realize 'cause I felt like I'm, I was different. You felt like you were different, right? Yeah. And I felt like other people don't lose things in their bedrooms.

[00:05:52] They know where all their stuff is. But it, I think, I think not until a lot later did I realize that other, other people. Like me, and there are other people who just don't have any issues with stuff. I don't think I ever realized that until a bit later, particularly 'cause of growing up. I lived in a house with stuff, so it wasn't like I'd come out of my family home and then all of a sudden I had a problem.

[00:06:17] It was just how I'd always lived. So, yeah. And then my other half is, From a similar family and also I would say is messier than me. He'll kill me for saying that, um, he, he's worse than me. So, you know, both of us together. I think I'd just always seen it as like, oh, people have stuff that's not a problem.

[00:06:38] And then when the friends died to comment, I realized, oh, maybe it is. It's not like nor normal. And then, yeah, 

[00:06:47] Lesley: so you were at uni. That's the first time that you, um, realized that you might have more stuff than other people. Let's call it that. But you're not going to have that realization at such a young age.

[00:06:55] This is going to be something that you're gradually going to work out of the years. So did you move back home again after uni or did you move in with your partner? 

[00:07:02] Marianne: Uh, moved home, took. One car to move me in on in first year took four or five car loads to move me out, like back and forth. Right. Um, 'cause the amount of stuff I'd got.

[00:07:15] And then I lived at home for two or three years once we saved up to buy a house, and then we moved in together. So, yeah. Yeah. 

[00:07:24] Lesley: And the kind of stuff that you bought back from Uni Maryam, was it? So you've talked a lot about the, the stuff for projects, for creative projects and things like that, which is kind of a, a byproduct then of being creative really, that we always see a projects and everything.

[00:07:37] Was there other stuff as well, or was it just 

[00:07:40] Marianne: art stuff? No, it was clothes, books. I love books, shoes, just, you know, all your classic things. Makeup. Yeah, I just, just ev everything. Everything that you kind of have in life. I had multiples of all of it. The clothes was particularly bad 'cause you know, I. I struggled to sort of find what my style was, which I think is a whole other thing about some of the decluttering stuff, but struggled with that.

[00:08:11] So I just would buy clothes. Yeah, so I, I just had everything. I had bags and bags of everything, and then fitting it back into my bedroom at home was a bit of a, 

[00:08:22] Lesley: Yeah. And I know you're an avid podcast listener, Marianne, so you will have listened to podcasts where I've spoke to my children, or we've talked about empty nesting and the fact that of kids moving out.

[00:08:31] So when you eventually moved out, so presumably you got a, a house eventually with your boyfriend and then you moved, um, you moved out of home. Did you bring your stuff with you or did you leave it behind like most kids do? 

[00:08:44] Marianne: My parents would say I left it all behind, which I don't feel like I did. I was very excited to move out, obviously.

[00:08:51] Um, it was our, our first time living together, we bought a house. It was very exciting, so I treated it. Like I was moving out properly, you know, I did, did try and pack everything up. Um, I didn't declutter a single thing really. I just packed it all up and took it with me. And yeah, I did leave some stuff and yes, there is probably still some stuff here, but I think that's sort of the blurry line between that I actually work here now and, you know, um, and a lot of the stuff that I did leave here ended up being art stuff.

[00:09:21] But my, my, my other half turned up to our house move with a bag for life with. Just some bits in, 'cause he knew he could. We've not moved far from our parents' homes and he, I think he knew he could just take it in dribs and drabs. So it, you know, I think, I think I did obviously leave some bits here, but I tried to move it all.

[00:09:41] Um, but that's another thing. That I didn't realize would fill the house up quite as much. You know, I, I think when you, when you move proper, say properly move house, when you move from one house and it has to be completely empty and you have to move to another house, like in a chain, you have to, you have to get everything done, don't you?

[00:10:00] You can't just leave some stuff. And I think that's one of the ways in which our house got full. 'cause we could, you know, ooh, let's just take this and, and people giving us stuff. Was the other thing, I think as, as a young person, as you're calling me, when you, when you buy a new house, every single person wants to give you their old sofa or their old dresser, and you're like, oh yeah, I'll have that because it's free or cheap at least.

[00:10:30] And then you end up with this. A whole house full of mismatch stuff that doesn't actually fit anywhere. Um, that was a, yeah, that was a, a fun adventure. Um, yeah. 

[00:10:43] Lesley: So when did you decide, so, um, we keep talking about the fact that you are young. Marianne, come clean and tell us how young you are so people can put you in, in context.

[00:10:52] How many years?

[00:10:58] Feeling old today. 

[00:11:00] Marianne: I, I'm 32, which doesn't feel that young, but I know it is compared to, you know, compared to your mom. Lots of people. 

[00:11:09] Lesley: Yeah. But yeah, exactly. Not 20 anymore. Exactly. So when did you decide that you wanted to actually declutter? 

[00:11:22] Marianne: Oh, I think it's get, when we got the house and I just saw the boxes everywhere.

[00:11:30] I felt like that's and and started to realize we've not got a huge house. It's a little terrorists, you know, to up to down type scenario. It's lovely, but it's not huge. I just thought, we've not got the storage for this, so, I mean, to get rid of some stuff, but. My version of getting rid of stuff was just sort of hiding it in boxes and putting, putting it away rather than, and not putting it away in an organised manner.

[00:11:58] Like nothing went together. It was all just shoved in boxes. So pro you know, properly getting down to some decluttering was probably two or three years ago and I started to read some books. I think it was, um, The ma, the Marie Kondo stuff. Mm-hmm. That quite interested me. So I've read her book, I've read some other, I've read some other things.

[00:12:20] Um, So I read the book, uh, the Life Laundry, um, which was a series back in the naughties, I 

[00:12:27] Lesley: think. Yeah, it was, it was on the TV back in the naughties. I remember watching that with, I think her names Donna or Dana or something like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 

[00:12:36] Marianne: And there were two little companion books that went with the series.

[00:12:39] I've got those, and it, it all, it all made sense to me, but I wasn't doing it. It's that sort of, I can read the diet book, but I actually have to stop eating crisps. Who knows that? Yeah. It's that, isn't 

[00:12:54] Lesley: it? Reading the book doesn't fix the problem. No. From, you've got to take action and accountability and that kind of thing.

[00:13:00] And that's where, yeah. 'cause the books are fantastic, you know, and they've all got different ways of doing things and everything, but it is taking those next steps from the book where a lot of people really struggle. Mm-hmm. So, so you read the books, did a little bit of decluttering. How successful were you?

[00:13:14] Marianne: Um, me medium. I, I think, I think I, I like to be organised in, in a lot, a lot of aspects with my business. I'm very organised and the house was not organised, so I think the most I got out of those things was I. Organising. So this sort of putting like with like as much as I could. So it was like the things I sorted out were like the sock drawer and you know, I maybe categorized things in the wardrobe and put all the books in the same place, but it, it, there wasn't a lot of exiting the house, you know, not a lot of stuff was actually going out.

[00:13:53] It was more. Putting, putting all my massive collections of things together. Um, so it's more 

[00:13:59] Lesley: organising rather than decluttering. That's the thing, and that's something that happens to a lot of people actually, Marianne, is that, and of course it looks better, you know, sort of organising your stuff always makes it look better than when it's chaotic, even, you know, even if stuff is not exited and we feel accomplished by just organising it.

[00:14:16] But then it gets to a stage where we really do have to. Lose some stuff so that we can then find a proper home for things. It's interesting you were talking before about, um, the boxes and putting things and not really finding a home for them, but it is finding a space for them. So what you were doing is kind of finding a space for the stuff that you had, but you weren't really finding a, it's ultimate home, if that makes sense.

[00:14:35] And that's the difference. And so, you know, again, it's organising. It's all about organising. It's understanding that difference really between. Decluttering and organising and tidying, which we go back to a lot in the declutter tub, which is super important. And it all gets kind of muddled around in a lot of people's minds as to what that is.

[00:14:52] 'cause if you're not, if you're not doing it, and if you're not gone through that process of understanding all the different components, we can spend more time doing other things. We can tidy up, make things look nice, we can do organising, but actually sometimes we just need to get down to the nitty gritty and do some decluttering.

[00:15:06] So that's the bit that probably was missing, taking that action. Or knowing how to do that. And then I believe you found the declutter hub. 

[00:15:14] Marianne: I did. Um, yeah. So my, my wonderful auntie has been a member with you for a while and would, uh, she, she was sort of poking my mum with lots of your information and because, you know, their sister's very close and, uh, she'd say, I've done this.

[00:15:34] And I think, I think she maybe. One, one of the abs, like the A to Z challenges or something, and she was just really proud of herself and we would hear about it a lot. You know, Marilyn would tell us a lot of really amazing things about it. And so my mom had started listening to the podcast and she was saying, oh, you should really listen to this.

[00:15:55] Oh, you should, you know, I think you'd really enjoy it. And, and in sort of classic child, I was like, I'm fine. Don't, you know, don't bother me with this stuff. Um, and then it was one day when we were, I think we were doing something in here and she said, let me just put this episode on, I think it was the one 

[00:16:15] Lesley: with Jill.

[00:16:16] Okay. 

[00:16:18] Marianne: And I think it really resonated with my mom. And she was like, you'll just, just listen to it. You'll love it. And I listened to it and I was hooked. I was absolutely hooked. And I, um, I completely rinsed. The entire, the Clutter Hub podcast within, you know, a month or so. I'd listen to every episode there was, and then I was waiting, like Friday morning would come, the new episode would come, I would listen to it.

[00:16:44] Like that's, that's how it is now. That is my life now. Um, so yeah, I just, I just got so much from that podcast. It was like finally, someone's actually sort of speaking my language. Oh, I'm not, I'm not the only one. I'm not. I'm not a complete anomaly and there's nothing wrong with me. This is just some people struggle with clutter and then it was the sort of, I think the emotional part that's a huge thing is that all the books I'd read, I don't really talk a lot about the emotions and I'm quite obviously an emotional driven.

[00:17:24] Person and it was like identifying when you'd say that's an aspirational thing. That's a, you know, that's memories. All these little, like the light bulbs. You say light bulbs. The light bulbs were going on. I was like, oh, that's why I like collecting those things. 'cause I've got an aspiration that one day I'll do something with them and it would, yeah.

[00:17:45] Every episode was like some nugget even, and I would, I would even listen to the ones like sorting kids' toys. I don't have children, but there's always a nugget. That was what I was like, there's always a nugget in there or something. I'm like, ah, yes, of course. So yeah, it just sort of, it just went from zero to a hundred on my radar of importance.

[00:18:05] And then I did the house, um, I just went for it. It was life changing actually, so, yeah. Oh, thank 

[00:18:16] Lesley: you. Well, I'm, I'm delighted. So, just to jump back a little bit, Marianne, the, uh, podcast that you're talking about is the one with Jill, who was one of my former clients, now a member who. As a big crafter. So she's a self-confessed kind of hoarding tendencies, crafter.

[00:18:30] So she talks all about why she has too much, probably still too much, and she would be happy for me to say that crafter and, and the, the kind of emotions that sit behind that. So, um, yeah, no, it is a quite a good podcast to listen to if you want to understand if you're a creative person. It's a brilliant one to.

[00:18:51] For you, for those emotions to kind of resonate with you. And I think that's it. You know, now after listening to all those podcasts, we're all, we're about, forget about the stuff for now. Don't worry about the stuff. We're all about the emotions. And then once you understand those emotions and see those traits, those habits in yourself, then you can start to make inroads into the stuff.

[00:19:08] But the one comes before the other. And I think that's where a lot of decluttering programs, it's not that the decluttering programs fall down, but we, we kind of clinging onto the bit that we want, which is the tidy drawer. Do you know what I mean? And we don't, you know, we want the tidy draw. It's more, more exciting and more fun to fold nickers than it is to actually think about why we've got 120 pairs of them.

[00:19:26] Do you know what I mean? And so it's things like that really. So that's where, that's where we're all about. So we're all about realism, so I'm delighted that you, you binge the podcast. That's, that's right At the beginning of this episode. A lot of people love to binge, like once you've started, they never stop.

[00:19:40] And then a lot of people just take it, um, one podcast at a time, whichever way it suits us. But the podcasts are a brilliant, brilliant way to. Start. So you did your whole house after the podcast and then you became a member, didn't you? 

[00:19:52] Marianne: Yeah, I got gifted my membership as my birthday present last year.

[00:19:57] Yeah, it was a, it was the best birthday present ever. Um, yeah. And it just made me realize, like you go into the community area, I mean, I'm a bit of a lurker. I'm not a massive poster, but, um, just, just knowing you're not alone, I don't know. And it's sort of like, Therapy, but for, for, for cluttered people. And, uh, one thing I really, really like about.

[00:20:21] Everything you do is it's not, and this has been a big un unlearning curve for me. It's not about being perfect, it's just, it's just about being slightly better or even hitting a goal that you want to achieve rather than all the per, you know, when you see everyone on Instagram, 'cause I, I'm obviously have a lot of presence on Instagram.

[00:20:46] And I see people with their, you know, house transformations and all of this, and it just, it's quite depressing actually when you're like, my house is never going to look like that because I've got all this stuff. And actually your, you and the members and everything they post, it's just normal houses. It's just normal people in normal houses.

[00:21:06] Who just wants to sort out a bedside table or, or it might be a big room of doom, but it's not, it's not about perfection. And I think that was really what grabbed me, um, massively about the membership area. You know, we're all struggling and we don't, I. We don't have to show up perfectly to matter. I think that's a big thing.

[00:21:25] Lesley: Yeah. See so, so, so important. 'cause you know, would it be nice to have an Instagram perfect home? Maybe? Can we create that? Sometimes, yes. I don't have a cluttered home, but I still have to tie you up before I put something on Instagram. Do you know what I mean? Because that's what people would expect from me.

[00:21:41] Do you know what I mean? So it's just, I don't know, it's, it is an interesting one. So, When we were talking about the kind of emotions, and we spoke about this before we, we started recording, you talked a lot about the fact that you had a lot of emotions that were like layered on top of each other. Mm-hmm.

[00:21:55] So, perfectionism of yourself, we've talked about, um, an Insta Perfect home, then let's call it that, but do you think that you suffer from perfectionism yourself? 

[00:22:04] Marianne: Absolutely. It's like, I'd say it's like number one of my traits as a human. I. It's, I think, um, I was listening to the podcast with Penelope, the member Pen.

[00:22:20] Uh, you did it a while ago with Penelope and she was saying, and it really resonated with me that I feel like everything must be perfect and when it's not perfect and it's a mess. Why should I even start like that? That's, and it's always been like that with a lot of things. Um, and I think the perfectionism leads into some control issues I have around, uh, delegating to other people asking for help and just letting someone else do something, you know, I'll.

[00:22:54] I'll, even if someone offers to cook me dinner, I'm there sort of going, oh, I wouldn't chop the onion like that. And I, and then I have to be like, no, it's not up to me. Not everything is on me to do. So the perfectionism feeds into that. The control stuff means I don't ask for help and then I just get really overwhelmed.

[00:23:13] So I think they're all my emotions. Um, There's some frustration in there. I definitely get frustrated with myself 'cause things aren't perfect. Um, I get frustrated with other people 'cause things aren't perfect. So I'm really trying hard to just stop expecting perfection, like, okay is fine. And it's never going to stay perfect even if you make it look nice.

[00:23:39] Like we all know that you're tidy. Something and about five minutes later it just looks lived in. Um, so I think now 

[00:23:46] Lesley: that you're talking about it, Marianne, I think it's very difficult because perfectionism as a floral designer is what is expected. And so in that area of your life, perfectionism and control, I.

[00:23:58] And to a point, it's hard to delegate your baby as well to somebody else when you've got your own business. And so these are traits that serve you very well in your business because who wants a kind of, you know, an unruly bunch of flowers, you know, to put it, you know, we want it to be perfect and it has to be perfect, and that's what people are paying for, but it's trying to separate that out from other areas of your life, I guess.

[00:24:19] Like I can be perfect, you know, Ingrid and I will always say, you know, We're good at this kind of stuff, but we are not creative. Do you know what I mean? So, you know, yes, we're really good at being organised people and understanding people's emotions, but we're not creative people. We can't craft, if you wanted us to put a, even to put a bunch of flowers in of ours, we'd struggle with that massive way.

[00:24:38] Do you know what I mean? And so it's knowing what you're good at and what you're not good at, and where perfectionism where it needs to stop in certain parts of your life, but it needs to come to the fore in other parts of your life. So it's not bad to be a perfectionist. 'cause that serve you well, but it's just knowing that perhaps that's not going to serve you well when it comes to managing your home.

[00:24:55] Hmm. So you've talked about sentimentality as well throughout this podcast. Do you feel like you're a sentimental person? Yeah, 

[00:25:02] Marianne: very much. I. I mean, I've got rocks that my other half gave me from a holiday seven years ago. I, and I just can't, getting rid of stuff is really hard and I just see, I, I, I see, uh, sort of are quite emotional about usefulness as well in, in some weird ways.

[00:25:24] So it's those two things. Something has potential to be useful, but it's also. Maybe got some memories or emotions in it, and that is just a recipe for disaster, you know? Yeah. Um, so yeah, and I, I've tried really hard to, I think one of the great lessons from the declutter hub is that sort of, you can have the stuff where you can have the space, and it's just weighing up with every item.

[00:25:54] Do they do my emotions towards this item or its usefulness? Do they act usefulness, future usefulness, aspirational usefulness? Are they worth the space it's taking up? And you know, it's sort of weighing up object by object. That, that, that little equation to me, um, has sort of changed a lot of things. So now I'm like, well, Yes, I'll keep some of the rocks, but I don't need to keep all the rocks.

[00:26:21] Like I found a few and I was like, I have no idea what holiday these are even from. But you know, he must have given them me and I would've gone, oh, pretty rocks and put them in my pocket. And then they end up in a jail somewhere and they can go, they can go out in the garden, you know, they, they can be gone.

[00:26:38] Because I don't actually have a memory of them. I've just sort of. Fortified a memory around them. But then I do have a rock in the bathroom, which has got just naturally a little heart shape in it, and my partner found it for me and gave it me, and I'm keeping that rock. So that's worth the space because I can remember where he got it.

[00:26:57] It looks nice and it lives there and that's fine. But yeah, it's sort of the space versus the stuff is the huge 

[00:27:04] Lesley: Yeah, exactly. Space versus store quality of a quantity and all of those kind of things. And I think you're so right that, that this is all about compromise, you know? So if you have too much stuff, which most people in our MD Laub community, whatever that community is, whether that's on the Facebook group, the podcast listeners, the membership, or people that read what we write, I think that.

[00:27:27] We know that there are decisions to be made about stuff, but we've got too much. And so we have to make hard decisions. We have to pull ourselves, push ourselves out of our comfort zone, and make decisions that are not simple decisions. We have to go a little bit deeper on those emotions and understand them.

[00:27:41] So we're going to go to the break now, and then after the break we're going to talk about your lovely workshop projects, which is what we, um, saw in our forum, and we were all like, Oh wow. All the members were like, that's amazing as a before and after picture. And I know that so many people would be super interested because it is a creative space.

[00:28:00] So we're going to go for a little break now. I'll be back in a minute.

[00:28:02] Okay, so welcome back Marianne. Let's talk about your, we're going to call it a studio. We're going to call it a workshop.

[00:28:08] Up to you. What would you 

[00:28:09] Marianne: like to call it? Studio, I call it the, that's what, yeah. Call tend to call it the studio. 

[00:28:15] Lesley: Tell us a little bit about how it came to be, the place that it 

[00:28:17] Marianne: is today. Um, yeah, so I used to have a different studio, which was in a diff different location. I. It was 15 minute drive from here.

[00:28:29] Um, and for one reason or another, I needed to leave that space. Um, COVID was a big factor in that, 'cause I was renting it. Um, and there wasn't a lot of money or business coming in, so it was, you know, cut down the outgoings as, as lean as possible. Um, This is a garage. The studio is a, is my parents' garage.

[00:28:53] Um, and before I moved to the other studio, which was probably five years ago, I did do a lot of my work in here, but it was, um, it was a closed studio. We wouldn't let people in because it was just chaos. Um, so I did, I did the work from here, um, you know, making up my. Bouquets and wedding flowers and stuff, but I never hosted anything in here.

[00:29:19] Whereas the other space, uh, it was a bit more aesthetically pleasing and I didn't have to have as much stuff in there. 'cause most of it was in here. Um, so I started hosting workshops and I realized I love hosting workshops. It's one of the. The biggest joys for me in my job. And I would host sort of educational workshops, but also practical workshops, you know, making things, working with flowers.

[00:29:46] Um, and when I. Came back to this space. I just thought, well, I don't want to get let go of doing that. I don't want to not have a workshop, you know, a, a people friendly workshop space. So I knew it needed, needed a, a good kick up the backside to get it into some shape where I felt like I could invite people here to have, you know, a comfortable.

[00:30:12] Uh, inspirational day. You don't, you don't want to pay money and go to a workshop and it be, you know, full of boxes and old charity bags. You know, it, it is got, it's got to, it's got to serve who you are welcoming in. So that, that was the, the mission. We also needed to, I guess it's sort of downsizing. We had two fairly large greenhouses and the studio at the other place.

[00:30:39] Um, and this space was full of. Well junk. Some of it was junk, but some of it is like an accumulation of 10 years worth of being a a florist. You have to, you don't just have one jug for a table center, you need 10, don't you? So there was all that sort of thing. And you know, I'd have clients who wanted a particular type of vase.

[00:31:03] I'd buy 10 of them and then no one else wanted that type of vase, but I'd still keep it because, you know, it's useful and I've spent money on it. Um, so yeah, there were lot, lots of, lots of things Got. Brought into here and they just needed going through, you know, one by one. Is this useful? Am I going to, do I need 10 of this?

[00:31:24] Do I need, you know, 18 of this particular type of vessel or whatever. And yeah, it was, it was those decisions that sort of really took up a lot of time. I'd say. Um, getting to where we are now. We also had, uh, a window put in, so. That was a bit of construction work. 'cause it, it can get quite dark in here.

[00:31:46] So, you know, we wanted a bit of natural light and then, so a bit of storage, but actually don't need as much storage as we thought we would, which is quite nice because I've managed to belut lots of it so. 

[00:32:01] Lesley: Yeah, as an aside, then when, um, when my friend was six day, we went to a floral workshop in Manchester.

[00:32:07] Oh. And it was literally like one of the best days we've ever had as a group of girls. So I know there's not many people listening that are around the corner from Bakewell. I. To be fair. So, but if you're fancy, you know, coming from all around the world to Marianne's workshops, that would be amazing. But if you do get the opportunity to go to another workshop, because I just thought it was lovely.

[00:32:26] As I say, I'm not creative at all. Um, but just the way it's explained and it's like, oh yeah, do you know what I mean? And it was just a really lovely day. It's just a nice vibe. It's nice to be around flowers, isn't it? 

[00:32:37] Marianne: I think, I think that's a big thing that I have taken away from a lot of my education.

[00:32:44] You know, I've had a very creative art education and it, it upsets me sometimes to hear like people, like you say, oh, I'm not creative. And I think, and maybe digressing here, but I think a lot of people have been told they're not creative and that's not really. Actually, I think it's, 

[00:33:01] Lesley: I think it's a choice as well.

[00:33:02] I mean, you know. Yeah, yeah. I think I'm, I, I don't think I'm creative in the traditional sense of the word, you know, in kind of arty. Yeah. Do I think I'm creative? Yeah. I can. We can create a podcast. We can create a membership. We can create a course. And so, you know, I can write an email. You know, all those things are creative in the room, but I.

[00:33:17] Actual arts and crafts for, you know, those kind of thing. It's not my bag. It's not my bag. I just don't really, it's not something that makes me really happy. But on an, on an occasion like that where it's a kind of a one-off, I couldn't see myself, I. Going into a floral course at college or anything, but I loved it as a one-off.

[00:33:36] Just thought it was a lovely, lovely vibe. We did a painting class a few weeks ago as well, which was like, it was called Sip and Paint since that was really nice as well. You just go and drink Prosecco and kind of try and pretend to paint. Now, honestly, the flowers were much more successful than painting.

[00:33:51] I'm not going to lie. I just think those kind of things are nice things to do. Nice afternoon 

[00:33:56] Marianne: isn't. Yeah. And that's, I think that's what I fell in love with. Like people coming in and like you say, oh, I'm not creative. And they come and then you show them how to do the thing that they're doing and they just come away and they're like, oh, I made this amazing thing.

[00:34:09] And it's a really like boosting, you know, happy. It's happiness, isn't it? It's a really happy thing to do. 

[00:34:15] Lesley: It is. So what, so you say you didn't need much storage, so I'm intrigued now where your stuff is. 

[00:34:22] Marianne: Where is that? Um, stuff is, is mainly not here anymore. We got rid of. An astronomical amount of stuff. Um, charity shop, going to the dump.

[00:34:35] Um, I sold some bits on like Facebook marketplace. A lot of people do, you know, do their own wedding flowers and uh, you know, wanted to buy all my jugs and whatever. So it was, it was literally pairing down. I, I don't need 10 of this. Like I was saying with pe, you know, somebody wanted 10 of that thing. I was like, well, I've never not used it since I don't need it.

[00:34:57] You know, I'm, I'm probably not going to use it again, so let's get it gone. Um, and then it was the organisation that just, I. Changed everything. You know, we bought a label maker. We bought Stacky boxes. Everything's organised now, so it doesn't really take up that much room. It's in sort of the one, there's one main cupboard with everything in.

[00:35:19] And then I. Other thing is, is I, I quite like to display some of my things. You know, I've got little arrangements here and there. Some of my vessels are quite pretty, so they're out on display, um, and they're on open shelves, so that wasn't too difficult to, to sort of work into here. And then, 'cause it's a working space, things do move around a lot, so I didn't want loads and loads of, you know, big cupboard space around.

[00:35:45] So it was just a matter of like, Getting rid of stuff really. Um, do 

[00:35:49] Lesley: you know what, I'm really interested in Marianne. 'cause you've, I know that you've done over the past few years, you've done a lot of mindset change and I think it sounds to me as if it's not so much about the storage and the way that you did that, although that plays a part of course in the organisation.

[00:36:03] It strikes me that when you said, I went out and bought 10 because he probably had a whole. Sailor that you could buy 10 vase is from, it felt like the cost effective thing to do to buy in bulk. But now it seems perhaps, am I right that you think, well, this client has asked for this one vase and I'll just go and buy one?

[00:36:19] Am I, am I right or um, 

[00:36:21] Marianne: It, it, it's more, you're right, completely right about the mindset thing. I think my mindset has completely changed and my business model, I guess, has changed in the way that you've got to offer people what you want to do. So I. If I don't offer that particular type of jug or vase or whatever, then either they need to find a florist who's going to do exactly that, or they can use these size VAs that I already have, and it's sort of making.

[00:36:51] Making the mo, making the stuff I do have work harder for me. Right. But, but doing that via the way I, I present, you know, when I do a mood board or I present to a client, I say, well, you could have this far or this far. 'cause that's what I've got. Not, not, um, oh, I'm going to get hold of whatever you want because then you are, you are sort of, They own you a bit more, don't they?

[00:37:16] They, they, they're, they're dictating, which I know client when it's, especially when it's like wedding clients, of course they should dictate a lot of the stuff, but this is what I have. It's this v or this vase. If you really, really, really hate this vase or this vase, then. Go somewhere else. 

[00:37:34] Lesley: Sounds so about, so you, we talked a lot about perfectionism.

[00:37:36] So you've allowed your perfect perfectionism to kind of go down a notch for this kind of thing and say, doesn't need to be absolutely perfect for everything. I can give people choices and they can choose and ultimately if they want it to be different then it can be. And that's, that plays into 'cause you, it would be impossible to have everything in your workshop in a small, confined space that's going to work for everybody.

[00:37:57] Exactly. So it seems that everything has sort of come together and now, So you went through your workshop, made it look beautiful, you got some storage in there, your mindset's changed. You've got less stuff, but obviously flowers and the nature of flowers is quite messy. So how do you make sure? Well, it definitely would be if I was doing it, um, Maybe it isn't for you, but you know, even when you go into a florist, there's all stuff all over the floor and all that, you know, you, you're not picking up after yourself every five minutes, are you?

[00:38:25] Every time you, um, trim a stem or whatever. I don't even know what the phrase is. What is the phrase for trimming the stem? I dunno, but whatever. Or do you, maybe you do. So do you tie up past you go or do you tie up the end of the day? When do you do your floral workshop resets? 

[00:38:41] Marianne: Um, I like to do sort of a smaller reset every day.

[00:38:45] So, you know, when I finish up, Today in here, I will sweep the floor and I will, you know, put anything away that I know I'm not going to use tomorrow, say, but then once I've done, I've, I've got a wedding this weekend, so once that's delivered and finished, I will come back in here and just make sure everything is back to square one, which is a new thing.

[00:39:10] It's a completely new concept to me. The, the reset thing in previous. You know, years in previous lifetimes, um, I would just like drop tools and just go, because I was, everything was so chaotic. I was like, right. I've. And it would just be a mess. And I would leave it until the next time I would need the space.

[00:39:36] So, and sometimes that wasn't always even the next week, it was two weeks and I'd come back in and I'd have forgotten how much of a mess I'd left it in. And then I'd need to reset it all before I then started work, which would then set me back. And when you're doing things like weddings, it's quite, you know, time sensitive.

[00:39:54] You need to be on it. And I would just be chasing my tail all the time. So now I'm, I'm so proud of this space that I do never, I never want to leave it in a state. I don't wish to find it, I guess is. How I feel about it. And I, I know lots of people call it different things, like a reset, non-negotiables. Um, I think someone on your podcast called it like a closing ceremony once or something.

[00:40:24] But I call it, um, doing future Marianna favor. That's what I'm, and I love that. So I stand here and I'm like, and I'm tired and I've just delivered a huge wedding. And I want to, you know, go home and go to bed. But actually I'm like, no, do future Marianna a favor. She will be so grateful for you if you just do this now.

[00:40:45] And then I do it and it kind of works. It's like how I talk to myself. I. Yeah, I mean, florist life is leaves everywhere. There's always leaves all over the floor and there's absolutely no point picking them up one at a time. You just sort of sweep at the end of the day or when you can't fill the floor anymore 'cause you're, and maybe have a sweep.

[00:41:03] But yeah, it's, it's not a tidy job. But I think the, the organisation of having boxes with labels, I know where I know where everything is. I used to not know where anything was. I would. You know, I'd, I'd lose all my scissors over like a couple of months. I'd have lost all my scissors because I'd, you know, lose one pair, pick up a new pair where I knew they were, and then lose that one and it would just be endless.

[00:41:32] And then you'd find three different bags with random things in, oh, there's, oh, there's a pair of in here like that. That's how my life went. It was like, uh, I guess, you know, you have the phrase of the sweep when someone's coming around for a coffee and you're just like, and put it somewhere. It was like that.

[00:41:51] Every time I would just be like, I need some space, and I'd, it'd all go in a box or it'd all go in a bag or something, and then, you know, a few months later I'd be like, I had have five minutes to, to look and I'd find all these things, and sometimes I'd have rebought them because I couldn't find the first one.

[00:42:10] So that's like a big waste of money as well, which is not good for business. Yeah. So it's, it's definitely just a mindset change, isn't it? Like this isn't working, it's not good for business, it's not good for me, it's not good for future Marianne. So let's just be a bit more disciplined. I think it's the discipline, isn't it?

[00:42:30] To just like, 

[00:42:31] Lesley: come on. No, it's just so fantastic to listen to. 'cause actually that transformation's happened over three or four years. Um, you've worked on it domestically then let's call it at home. You've worked on your mindset, you've worked, it's impacted on your business. You know, those research are brilliant and the fact that you.

[00:42:48] Recognize what that's going to, you know, spending those extra five minutes at the end of the day, doing those resets and sorting things out for future Marianne, how that's going to help you. 'cause it's all about waking up the next day to go into a space, whether that's a kitchen, a bedroom, or a workshop, and being proud of it and enjoying it and not feeling down and ne and, and negative emotion coming over you as soon as you've woken up.

[00:43:09] Mm-hmm. That's what it's all about. So, Thank you so much for sharing, Marianne. It's been such a great journey. It's lovely to see. I'm so excited that we were able to help you. Um, you've, you've obviously done all of the hard work, but it's good that we can inspire you a little bit to think about these different parts of your life.

[00:43:25] And before we go, there's one other little thing that I want to talk about because a little bird told me that, as well as doing all these fantastic things, like changing your mindset, changing your workshop, building your business, doing all these things, You've written a book. 

[00:43:40] Marianne: Yeah. I dunno how I did it all at some sometimes, but, um, yeah, I've written a book.

[00:43:45] Um, it's all about growing flowers, which is what I do. Um, I. I know we're saying florist, but I'm a florist who uses British flowers as well, which is very important to me. So I've written a, a book, a, a sort of beginner's guide on how to, uh, start growing your own flowers if you want. And a little bit of sort of, My workshops, but, but at home.

[00:44:09] Um, so there's projects in there of how to do some different floral arrangements as well with your own flowers once you've grown them. Yeah, I, I'm, I'm definitely not sure how I managed to do it all in the last year, but I can definitely say that. Getting on my decluttering journey just helped so much, like just changed my mind.

[00:44:32] I know we said mindset a lot, but it's that, it's that thing of like, Being organised, feeling more confident in being more organised makes these goals and these projects actually achievable rather than just sort of swimming around in chaos, not knowing what you're going to do next week. I really had to make a plan.

[00:44:52] I had deadlines, you know, big, scary, real deadlines for books and yeah, just meeting them. Was made easier by, uh, having less stuff. So, yeah. 

[00:45:04] Lesley: Fantastic. Okay, so before Mar, before we go, Marianne, do tell us what the name of your book is, because we're going to find it. We need to know what the name of 

[00:45:10] Marianne: it is. Uh, it's Cut Flower Growing by Marianne Slater.

[00:45:14] Um, it's available at all good bookshops and. Amazon as well. Yeah. Fantastic. 

[00:45:20] Lesley: Oh, thank you so much. And I know what we've been talking about today is quite visual, so what I'm going to do is I am going to drop some lovely images of your workshop so that anybody who's um, listening can go and take a look at what it actually looks like.

[00:45:32] 'cause I'm sure a lot of people will be like, I want to see what that looks like, that workshop looks like. So, um, that's going to be in the show notes and you need to go to declutter hub.com/ 1 9 8 to see those show notes so you can see them there. What are we talking about next week? Next week we are talking about.

[00:45:49] 10 things you need for the perfect declutter. I'm sure Marianne could probably tell you what they are after binging all 197 podcasts and now you can listen to yourself on 1 9 8. How cool is that? Thank you so much for being here, Marianna. Really, really appreciate you taking the time to share your story.

[00:46:06] Shay, what I think is transformational, actually, I love the productivity side of it from a business perspective, and I've loved having you as a guest, so thank you so much. Thank you. 

[00:46:15] Marianne: It's been a pleasure.

Subscribe now so you don't miss an episode

Listen on

Apple Podcasts

Listen on

Amazon Music

Listen on

Spotify

Watch on

YouTube

Prefer to watch rather than listen? Watch on YouTube

It's time to start preparing for Christmas. Click below for more information about our fantastic Countdown to Christmas

A graphic showing Santa's hands holding a piece of paper saying Countdown to Christmas

Useful Links and Resources

Subscribe now so you don't miss an episode

Listen on

Apple Podcasts

Listen on

Amazon Music

Listen on

Spotify

Watch on

YouTube

Share 0

Tweet 0

Pin 0

Page [tcb_pagination_current_page] of [tcb_pagination_total_pages]

First

Last

Marianne's Before and Afters

THINKING A LITTLE DIFFERENTLY THIS CHRISTMAS – A GUEST BLOG BY MARIANNE SLATER

Gifts. Stuff. Things.

Every Christmas the high street and shopping centres fill with people trawling for that perfect 'thing' for their loved ones. Black Friday creates chaos and Cyber Monday sends the delivery drivers into hyperdrive as online sales for 'stuff' escalate at a rapid rate throughout November and December. It's a fact of this modern, fast paced world, that this thrilling wave of capitalism grips the country each winter in new and elaborate ways.

I am speaking as someone who was out there in the shopping centres myself, chasing the sales, buying anything I thought might fit the bill without much mind for if the person I was giving it to would even like it. Every year would fill a hand made advent calendar with an array of little 'bits' for my mum, finding 24 tiny lipsticks, hand creams, hair pins and more, whilst not even taking into consideration that she'd probably not yet used last years bits up - I was just adding to an ever growing pile.

It was something I did with love, and I did it because that's what people do to show love. Or at least it is when we are conditioned to believe that giving someone more stuff shows them how much you care?

But in reading this, if you think I don't also like stuff you're wrong, I bloody love it. I'm a self confessed recovering 'stuff addict' to be honest, and during my 'recovery' I've been learning and changing how I think and feel about owning and buying more and more things. The stuff I bring into my life now, mostly consists of well thought out, nice, beautiful things, both new and old.

Also, please don't think I'm a Scroogey old Grinch either, because I genuinely love Christmas, especially the giving and receiving of gifts. I love the gorgeous wrapping paper and ribbon, I love a pile of things under the tree and I relish the look on someone's face when you get them just what they wanted, needed or didn't even realise they were missing in their lives - it's a magical feeling. But I've changed the way I do things over the last few years*, and I've morphed, from the happy, compliant shopper, to a thoughtful and intentional gift giver.

So, I want to try and explain to you what that means to me and how, if you wanted to, you might start doing it too...

Look at your own stuff and challenge some of your emotions

One of the best ways to start re-thinking how you buy for others is to actually have a look at your own stuff. I'm a huge advocate for only having stuff that you use, need or love in your life. When life seems stressful and noisy, and you can't seem to see the woods for the trees, it can so often be because you are surrounded by all those things you don't really use, need or love and they're drowning out the space, calm and all the other things you do use, need and love. This is part of a bigger picture in decluttering* but if we are thinking about gifts in particular, take a look at some of the things you've received in the past and ask yourself those questions in relation to those things... Do I use it? Do I need it? Do I love it? There will of course be loads of things that tick all those boxes, but I also guarantee that there will be a few things that are none of the above. Then, think about the emotions that come up when you consider those gifted items.

Usually, the most common emotion that comes up is guilt. You don't use, need or love that object, but someone you love has given it to you so it feels like an extension of your relationship with them and in turn, clouds how you feel about the object - so you keep it.

Now, I'm not here to tell you if that's right or wrong, some items have sentimental value, some bring up complicated dynamics in relationships, the list goes on and each situation is different. I'm definitely not telling you to throw away all your unused gifts!! But the point I am trying to bring home is that maybe when you give a random gift that hasn't been considered, are you actually just lumping someone with more stuff, stress and guilt? This idea really helped to change my mindset and I now, don't want anyone I love to feel obliged to keep things I buy them out of guilt. Obligation is pernicious and I would hate to make someone's life feel more cluttered through my actions.

Really think about the person you're buying for

This brings me to the concept of intentional gift giving. The next few points are things that I have done or that I do to help me navigate the world of 'intentional gifting'.

Listen to people when they talk about stuff. I keep a running list on my phone with everyones names that I usually buy gifts for and if they mention a place, an event or an object or if I see something I think they might like when I'm surfing the net, I can just pop it on the list. It's been invaluable to me and resulted in some really great surprises.
If you're going to a local market or event with the person in question you could subtly stalk what they're most keen on perhaps. Just make sure to make a note of what it is and work out how you will get the item without them knowing (if that's important to you).
Think about the hobbies they enjoy, and if there is someone else or a business you know who do accessories or kit related to that hobby then definitely reach out to them. Most places, especially small businesses, are so keen to help you out with advice and suggestions.
If you really don't know what to get them I honestly don't think there is anything wrong with asking them. They might not come back to you with anything much of course, but even if you can find out their favourite gin or a type of cheese they love, you can certainly build from there. Also, try asking other family members, friends, partners etc for inspiration.
If they do genuinely really want a gift set from Boots, that's absolutely fine - as long as it's genuinely wanted/needed by the recipient and is going to be used then that's what we're aiming for!

Do some research

Once you have some ideas it's time to do the research bit. Make sure you look locally or try and find a small business who can supply what you need. Another great idea if you're stuck is to find places that offer gift cards or certificates for their goods and services. I once researched where a friend was going on holiday and bought them a voucher for an afternoon tea at a lovely seaside hotel for them and their partner. It was a really great way to make sure she got a treat but with enough flexibility that she could book it herself - that's part of the joy of a gift card, it's targeted but also flexible at the same time.

Also, as I said in the above bullet points, asking an expert is always the best way to get a really good tailor made gift. Many moons ago, I used to work in a country sports and fly fishing shop (I really am a woman of many talents!) and it was always a joy to help people put thoughtful gifts together for fly fishers. It's quite a niche hobby, and if you don't know anything about it it can be really hard to know what to buy. I loved listening to them describe the gift recipient and the sorts of fishing they did or the locations they travelled to, and knowing our product range I could help them select and curate their purchase easily. Business owners and sales staff are literally trained to help you with these things, they're the experts in their field and products/services/events/etc, so ask away and you should definitely get some good results.

Think about alternatives

My main reason for writing this blog was to sort of state why I think buying people experiences, workshops or days out over stuff is really where my heart is at, but as I've written it, I think the broader message has become the piece about thinking outside the box and doing it all with intention. To break the cycle of how we do things and really consider what we're buying and where we're spending our money.

I will however indulge in a little bit of waxing lyrical on why experiences make such great gifts.

Making memories - I can remember all the times I've gone somewhere for an activity or done an interesting craft at a workshop. Some of my favourite memories with certain friends are things like; the Harry Potter cocktail making pub experience (with wands, robes and dry ice!!), the terrazo coasters I made at a workshop in Leeds (currently balancing my tea on one as I type), the ring I'm wearing I made with my partner in a jewellery workshop - so yes, some of these things resulted in items, but the memories I have every time I look at those objects are priceless. Which leads into...
Learning new skills - this is such a powerful reason to go and just try something new, I can now make a ring, paint a banners, make lace, create a lino cut card, make a Harry Potter themed cocktail (I actually don't think I can remember the recipes, but hey!), the list goes on. I won't necessarily be doing these things in my spare room every weekend, but that's part of the joy of getting to try these things out. Someone else has collected and curated all of the materials/ingredients and I'm just there to create. Which then leads to...
Creative time - which is so precious!! And I say that coming from an incredibly creative business. You probably think all I do is create all day long, but the reality is that life, admin, client work and everything else in between gets in the way of a really self indulgent creative session. So many people who come to my workshops just relish in the fact that this is miles away from their normal 9-5 and enjoying a few hours where someone else can facilitate some beautiful creativity, fun or learning is a really precious thing.

To sum it up, I think this quote from one of my workshop participants this year says it all... "It was the most relaxing and creative day away from 'real life'. Being given the chance to absorb the tranquil surroundings of Marianne's flower filled studio and learn from her directly was a complete joy, and I was super proud of what I made! "

And that's just how I feel when I go on creative workshops too! Proud of what I've made, peaceful at the experience and relaxed all over. Bliss.

Communicate your intentions with others

So, you've decided on a more intentional gift giving vibe in your life, you've done your research, you've found great gifts and experiences for your loved ones, but there is one final bit that is quite important to consider...

It's all good and well me saying 'don't buy your family more stuff, get them intentional gifts and experiences' but if others are not on the same wavelength they may feel real disappointment at the lack of the types of gift they're used to getting. That's why it's really important to remember to communicate what you're doing to those you love, and if they're willing to listen, explaining why you've changed the way you're doing it. This conversation goes both ways as well, firstly, you need to tell people you don't want to receive any more random stuff for yourself this year and maybe make some helpful suggestions of stuff you do want or need. Secondly, you should try to explain to them that you'd like to get them something that they really want and need as well, rather than burden them with more things you're not sure they'd like, which can be a great staring point to gather useful suggestions too. It's possible this all may go down like a lead balloon, but at least you've tried, and if all else fails and they don't seem receptive, well considered consumables are a good option. I think things like drinks that they love, foods and hampers from local suppliers or restaurant vouchers or soaps/cosmetics are usually universally acceptable - the key phrase here is well considered.

So, good luck with your gifting this year, please use this as a gentle guide as to how you could reframe your mindset around some of the mass gift giving we are conditioned for in society, but also know there's absolutely no need to beat yourself up or feel you're doing it 'wrong'. I really don't think there is any such thing as right and wrong when it comes to effecting change, there is just progress, and if you've got this far with reading this blog post then you've made more effort than a good 75% of the population!

Be kind to yourselves, be kind to others, and don't get caught up in anything that doesn't feel comfortable to you.

Oh, and shop small where you can.

This all properly started for Marianne when she began to really look at her stuff. The stuff in her house and in her work studio. She is now a fully converted declutter-er, and as she says this is definitely what has brought about this incredibly powerful mindset change in regards to gift giving.

Share 0

Tweet 0

Page [tcb_pagination_current_page] of [tcb_pagination_total_pages]

First