A graphic on the left saying Boost Therapy and an image of a woman smiling Kirsty Leitch from Boost Therapy all on a pink background
Episode 277 – Techniques to overcome anxiety when decluttering with Kirsty Leitch

We had the pleasure of chatting to Kirsty Leitch from Boost Therapy in episode 272 of the podcast. Today she’s back to talk to us about techniques to use when you’re feeling anxious. What steps can you take to alleviate it both in the short term and long term? Be sure to tune into Part 2.
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Transcript of this podcast episode
00:00
Today in the podcast, we're gonna be talking to Kirsty Leitch again, because he was with us in Episode 272 of the podcast and explained brilliantly what anxiety is and how it represents in our day to day lives. Today, she's back to us to talk about techniques and strategies that you can use if you're feeling anxious. What steps can you take to alleviate anxiety in both the short and long term?

00:33
You're listening to the declutter hub podcast, bringing you tried and tested no nonsense tips and advice from the leading experts in decluttering and organizing your home. Now here's your host, Lesley Spellman.

00:55
Hello, and welcome, listeners. I'm Lesley, we're delighted you're here to join us as part of your decluttering journey. So whether you're brand new today or have been listening in for ages, we want to say thank you so much for being here. It means so much to Ingrid. And now that you turn up every week to listen to and support us. While we talk all things decluttering and organizing. We'd love to help more people with their quest for a clutter free home and our podcast is a fantastic way for people to be inspired to take action, we have a favor to ask. If you like what you hear, be sure to hit the follow subscribe or like button on your podcast player. share us with your friends, or share your thoughts on the podcast by leaving a review. So carefully. Welcome back to the podcast. delighted that you're here. I was so excited to talk to you about anxiety because I think even though I have a good understanding of it, I think it really explained it so easily and succinctly that I felt like I definitely learned something from that podcast. Thank you so much. So welcome back. Thank you for having me. So today we're going to delve in a little bit more into strategy because I'm sure in Episode 272. A lot of people be like, well, what can I do? What can I do to fix it? Like, let me fix it, Kirsty. And so we're definitely going to delve into that. And really, I'm not going to be asking many questions, it's going to be really over to you. But I know, you know, there are things that people will talk about, I know you mentioned briefly breathe in, in the last episode, where we're talking about panic attacks and things like that. And other things like tapping, obviously, general things like walking out in the fresh air. You're a Hypnotherapist. And so we're gonna unwrap all of that today and talk about what do you actually do to fix? kind of fix? Alleviate improve? Yeah, let's go improve? Shall we go improve? Yeah, fixing would be nice. Wouldn't that exactly a lot would be nice. I'm not saying you can't, you absolutely can. But improving I think gonna go, it's gonna go

02:53
far enough, then the only way is up from there. Okay, so we talked about what anxiety is, and all the different types of anxiety. And of course, what people are really interested in interested in is finding out, but what do I do when I'm having those ridiculously anxious feelings that I feel like my heart's beating out of my chest, and all of these things, and it puts me I feel very difficult. So explain again, what it is that your body and your mind are doing in tandem, that causes that and then we're going to go into the techniques. Okay. So when we are in anxiety, it's a nervous system response is a physical response that actually happens. And so our body is sending signals, which then causes us to have thoughts, thoughts, there are electrical signals. And then we have these thoughts, which in turn, create more signals. And so our body physically responds. Because we're sending messages, just the same as if you send a panic text message, then you're going to panic in return as you reply to that person, what's going on. Our body is doing the exact same thing. It's sending a panicked message, you're receiving that message, and then you're replying with more panic, and you're caught in that cycle. So then your body starts producing all of these stress hormones. You'll feel fueled with cortisol and adrenaline.

04:20
And your heart is beating. And it's all because of this. Freeze fight and flight response that we experience. Your body doesn't know that actually, you're hiding at home because you can't bear to look at the mess that's in that other room. You shut the door and you're having a moment. Your body thinks I'm in real danger. I'm going to be eaten by a saber toothed Tiger, I need to get away. And so your heartbeats because you need to pump blood around your body faster. Your breathing is faster because you need to keep up with your heartbeat. You might have to run to the toilet because your body

05:00
want you to be lighter because you can run faster, all of these physical things are happening because of those signals because of those thoughts because of those feelings, and it just continues. And that's, that's essentially what is happening. It's a stress response with our fight or flight. And the freeze is when we can't do anything else, we sit there, and we don't know what to do that overwhelm that wall hits you, that you don't know what to do. First, let's talk about a couple of things that you talked about. And a lot of people will completely understand this, but some won't. So we talked about adrenaline, you talked about cortisol. So what why are they in our bodies, and what do they do, they do good stuff for us in the right quantities, they need, we need some of this stuff to make our bodies work in a certain way. Because sometimes we do need to be stressed, we do need to be aware of certain things, we don't want to be completely unaware of our surroundings and what's going on. Because if we weren't, then you're just gonna walk into the middle of the road, you know, no one wants to do that we need to be aware, we need to have an element of caution around us so that we don't go and put your hand in the flame when you're cooking your dinner. We need our mixtures of hormones and chemicals for our bodies and our cells to do the things they're supposed to do. Like we don't want to go neuroscience and start talking about big long words that I can't pronounce, and no one wants to know about. But we need a little bit of everything. You know, it's very yin and yang, there isn't any good hormones and chemicals and bad hormones and chemicals, they all have a job to do. And when we need them, we need them for waking up, we need them for going to sleep, our body needs all of this stuff. The problem is, is when you have too much of a good thing, then it's not working, it causes other problems. And that's just the same as any other, you know, external substance that you might have, you know, it might be nice to in joy, a g&t on a Friday, but if you have 12, then it's a problem. It's too much of a good thing causes bad stuff to happen on the inside. So it's the same as our hormones. So we've talked about anxiety and stress, okay, and that there's a bit of a kind of, you're generally anxious all the time. And then there are triggers that happen that might cause stress that make you excited to get worse. So let's think about a couple of scenarios. You live in with sort of general anxiety. So you know that something that's coming up is going to make you very anxious. So what can you do in advance of that thing happening, that potential trigger to kind of pre frame it a little bit to kind of try to stave it off. So let's talk about things that you need to do in advance of it happening. Okay. So in this sort of situation, this is something that we potentially will classed as catastrophizing. So, you know, you've got something coming up, and it's, it starts off in the back of your mind, and you can feel that thought about this event, slowly coming to the forefront of your mind. And then all of the bad things going to happen. You know, maybe you've maybe you've got to do a presentation at work. You saying, Oh, my gosh, people are gonna think I'm stupid. People are gonna think this, what if I do this? What if my trousers fall down all of these things, they pop into my head, even though you might be thinking, there's that that logical part of you is like, oh my gosh, Kirsty, this is ridiculous. Pull yourself together. That emotional part of you, that is running all of these thoughts, all of these behaviors don't care, does not care that your logical part is saying all of this stuff. So what we have to do is we need to work with our body, it's not necessarily something you can talk yourself out of, okay, we have to work with our body. And that goes back to

08:58
one of the things I already mentioned, was breathing, because it works. So effectively. There are tons of breathing exercises that are available to do. Some of them can be really convoluted. It's like you have to count for this money and count for that many. And it can be a little bit overwhelming. And what if I'm not breathing enough in the right way? And is it going to the right place, the most important thing to slow down the body when the body speeds up, so do the thoughts and then the body speeds up some more, we want to slow the body down.

09:32
And one of the easiest ways to do that is to breathe out for longer than you're breathing in.

09:40
So we can forget about all of the counting. They do work, but if you're already panicking, let's just breathe out for longer than you breathe in.

09:50
And if you make an A cup office, a perfect, perfect time to practice, not always advocate, practicing any of these things that we taught

10:00
About so that you know a little bit more about how to do them when you need them, you know, you wouldn't go and have swimming lessons in the middle of the channel,

10:09
you practice first before you dive in. And that's the same with any of these tools or techniques, when you're working with the body is practice.

10:19
If you can breathe down, like breathe all the way down so that your tummy comes out instead of your chest rising, then you're doing a good thing. Okay, so it's coming out slowly. So we need to FM just to understand this, then I'm breathing out which is really good, because that's a really easy tip. Yeah, breathing out for longer than breathing him. Yeah, I then changing my breathing patterns anyway, to try and get a longer breath. So you consciously breathe in. So I'm not trying to elongate my breath out, which will conversely, probably elongated in as well. Does that make sense? It does make sense. So if you're in a panic, I would say, don't worry too much about that. Just make sure that you're blowing it slowly. That's the difference is the breath coming out slowly. When we're panicking, our breath is always short and sharp, it's like, you know, it's like that panting. And if you even if you breathe in quickly, you can still breathe that same breath out really slowly. So it's like,

11:26
okay, it's still the same volume of air, but it's released slower. So low and slow, breathe, breath brings that breath down into your tummy. And that's one thing if you can remember low and slow, when you are practicing.

11:44
If you can breathe in a little bit slower than normal, and breathe it out even slower still, then that's great. So if you're feeling okay, you're going to make a couple. Practice, breathing slowly, practice slowing all of those things down. Because you'll find that general level of anxiety that sitting with you will begin to reduce, and this is something that you do need to practice. It's not just one breath, and everything's going to be fine, because that would be amazing. But it doesn't work that way. You do have to practice it, because your body needs to a hear and receive the message and then respond. So we have to give it time to respond. So do you think that the breathing the practicing of the breathing? Yeah. Is that just that you can pull on that when you need to? Or do you think if you are, you know, normally kind of living in a heightened kind of state of anxiety, that it's going to help you to do it anyway, does that make it freezing is one of the best things that we can do, specifically nasal breathing. So in the nicest possible way, listeners, please keep your mouth closed,

12:58
just in and out of your nose when you're doing it because our nose works in a very special way that it directs our breath. And all of the wonderful things it does to a part of our brain called the insula. And that will allow us to respond in a different way than just breathing in and out of the mouth, which is what we do when we're in panic, you can practice your breath, any point of time, this is something I do every morning, when I wake up just for two minutes. If I'm stood waiting for the tea, waiting for a bus and waiting for the kids to come out of the class, a minute time makes a huge difference. Just because you are having that conversation regularly with your body that you are safe.

13:45
And that being safe allows your body to respond. So okay, maybe I don't need to panic anymore. It's like holding that little younger, you know, holding the handset, please. Okay. So we might be going to a different place and didn't know how to get there. But we're still okay. And you're allowed to do that. And one, that's one big thing is give yourself permission to let yourself feel safe. We don't have to be in panic all of the time. I think it's going to be all about sort of habits stuck in a little bit, isn't it to change this into your daily routines. You talked about doing that while you're making a cup of tea. And it could be other times of the day and other people kind of you know, have set routines where they kind of do meditating and yoga and breathe breathwork was probably part of that as well. So yeah, it's definitely trying to incorporate that in your day and in advance of these kinds of things happen. And so you can then pull up on that as and when you need it. Exactly. Yeah. So breathing is definitely a big one for sure. And that's easy, right? It doesn't cost us anything.

14:47
And so that's a really useful tip and it's something that we all kind of know is there. But we don't maybe invest the time into really practicing and learning how to do it.

15:00
The most effective way.

15:03
Tapping is a big one that I've heard of as well. So can you explain the principle of tapping and what that feels like? I know it's quite difficult. I mean, Kirsty is on YouTube, if you want to watch on YouTube, and hopefully she might show us some stuff as well. A little something. Yeah, but it's tricky to do on an audio podcast, really. I'm sure we can manage. All right, Lesley.

15:25
So, typing, there is a few different ones. There's a bit like everything, there's all these different names for things. So tapping, you might have seen as EFT or TF, T, or T TT. So all these various ones, basically, the provider is using our meridians, the energetic meridians that are on the body. So if you go for acupuncture, then someone will put all those little needles in the different meridians on your body to help with the energetic flow and making your body work in harmony. Tapping uses that same principle, but instead of needles, which I think is a plus, I'm a big believer

16:05
that you can do it yourself as well, you don't need somebody to do it for you, you cannot injure yourself, you cannot make things worse by doing tapping. So it's something you might as well try if it works for you, fantastic. If it doesn't, then I'm sure there's another tool that you'll be able to use. So by activating these meridians in our body, it allows the the energy or the blocked energy to begin moving. So one of the easiest things that you can do, obviously, tapping on your body in various places in public might not be

16:45
the easiest thing to do. And that might be anxiety inducing in itself. If you think oh, no, I've got to start tapping on my face.

16:54
So our hands are, they are like Spaghetti Junction for nerves. That's how we do all of our feeling. Okay, so our hands are a really wonderful place, that if you just want to experiment with how you can recept yourself, there is a couple of nice points on your hands that you can tap. Now, I always recommend tapping with two fingers, because we're working with the premise that we're working with energy, okay. And that means we have a positive and a negative. So let's use two fingers. And if you use this side of your hand, so like the karate chop, if you're going to do karate chop, then it's the side of your palm. Doesn't matter which hand, you tap, it doesn't matter which one you do the tapping with, some people find that one is more comfortable than the other. But if you tap on the side of your hand, just like that,

17:47
you can, you could do that quite easily. If you sat on the train, you know, if your hands are in your lap, just tapping on the side of your palm is a really nice way to reset without it being really obvious than starting tapping various points around your face in the middle of public place.

18:03
And that's a nice way to reset, but also in between your little finger and your ring finger. So for those of you on YouTube, there's a spot just right here. This is called our Gamma spot. And if you tap on that one there, again, with your two fingers, those two places, I would say, are a really nice place to start. If you want to experiment with tapping, if you haven't done it with somebody who knows all of the points, our hands are really, really powerful. So for tapping, have a practice on those. And what I recommend you doing is if you are feeling anxious, let yourself feel anxious for a moment. Because we always try and avoid it.

18:46
We always want to get rid of that horrible feeling. But when you're tapping, if you give yourself permission for that anxiety to be there for a moment, and then begin tapping it. Most people most of the time, will feel that anxiety begin to dissipate. Wow, I'm just

19:06
I have had a lot to say I'm speechless for once in my life. So maybe now's the time to go to a break and what I want to talk about when the comeback breathwork tapping fantastic. We've talked about hypnosis or hypnotherapy. And I want to delve into that part of your work and how that works. And what that is because a lot of people say, Oh, that sounds a bit weird. I don't think I fancy that. Like you were nine years ago, right? So we're gonna get a break. Now we're gonna come back. And afterwards I'm gonna talk about hypnosis. Thank you so much, Kirsty. So welcome back. So in the first half of the podcast, we spoke about breathwork we spoke about tapping and kirsta gave us some super easy things that we can do in public every day, you know, practicing all of those kinds of things that we can start to incorporate in our day to day lives, which is really, really helpful. If you want to see a little bit more than YouTube is the place to be so you can go

20:00
we'll actually see those things in action. So, but we talked to so Kirsty, tell us a little bit about your day to day life, your role in working with people with anxiety. And then it can explain a little bit more about the hypnotherapy work that you do. Okay, so, day to day, I work online with people. So you can be anywhere, which is great, because that means you are in your environment where the anxiety happens, you're not having to go somewhere and try and create that stress, that anxiety that worry that is normally there. And by using hypnosis, which is my favorite tool, and I'll tell you why is because we get to have a different way of communicating with ourselves. Anxiety is hypnosis, okay? Anxiety is hypnosis, because it hasn't actually happened. Now, our brain is amazing, I love brains, they're brilliant. They do so much for us, okay, you do so much that you are completely unaware of you, you breathe, you don't make that happen. It just it happens, isn't it, your heartbeats, it just happens. You heal. If you trip over and you've got a scab, it just happens. That's your body, your unconscious, running all of the processes it needs to do.

21:28
It does not know the difference between what you're actually doing, and what you are thinking you are doing. So you are sat at home. And then you turn around and look at a stash of stuff and it causes you anxiety, I've got to do that, then I'm going to do this, and then this is going to happen, then this is going to happen. And that's gonna happen, all the other things gonna happen.

21:51
Your brain has already processed it, that all of that stuff has already happened. The same as if you watch a scary film, and it makes you jump, you know that actually you're tucked up in your jammies on the sofa, that that horrible monster is not coming to get you. But you still respond with fear. That's because your brain thinks that thing is happening. It is real as far as your brain is concerned. And that's why anxiety is so powerful at getting the body to respond. Hypnosis is pure focus, but on purpose. So because we are giving directions, and somebody like me is giving you suggestions and directions to do things, your brain is going through all of those processes, as if things are actually happening. So if we can use hypnosis, because you already can do it, if you have anxiety, you are already in hypnosis, we are doing it on purpose, which is why it's so powerful at getting your brain to reverse what we're doing all of those thoughts that you have create amazing neural pathways. So it's just like a motorway getting from A to B.

23:08
But when you've got anxiety, you've got 100 million roads old gets that same destination of panic. When we use hypnosis. We it's like doing roadworks so we start shutting down those roads, and reopening and constructing new neural pathways to take you to a different destination, which is karma, which is more confident, which is feeling in control, rather than this thing is happening to you, you are in control of it. Hypnosis is something we all do naturally. And it's a really lovely place for our bodies and our minds to be in. And if you've if you read, if you get the opportunity to read and you become absorbed in that story in the characters, you don't care that there might be other people wandering around you because you're absorbed in the story that's similar to hypnosis, you're absorbed in the thing that you're focusing on. And it's really powerful. And once you know how to do that, you can then do it yourself. You don't need a hypnotist to take you into hypnosis, once you know how to get there. It's like any skill. Once you learn how to do it, you can do it for yourself. I think that I mean, it's really interesting way to actually say that we're already hypnotized in our own bodies through anxiety, that's really interesting. And also to say that we can hypnotize ourselves as well as the couple of things that have kind of jumped out really interesting. People are a little bit nervous about it. Right. So why don't you explain why we shouldn't be nervous about allowing our bodies and our brains to go to this place that people are a little bit nervous about. Okay, do you mean nervous about hypnosis? People would be nervous, okay, because of course, when we're talking about hypnosis, a lot of people have seen comedy hypnosis before.

25:00
I do stupid things and dinner to me, there's something that's so powerful to, you know, stop people from smoking, for example, or stop me from drinking or, you know, complete life changing things. Yeah. You know, something very strong has got to go on to make that happen. And I think people are nervous about maybe the peripheral things that might go along side that I do add. I mean, surely you you must hear that right that people? Oh, I'm not sure. I'm not sure. So talk to us about that part of it. Because that, you know, from the way they've explained it, I'm like, why are we not doing this? But what is it that stopping people that are struggling from jumping in, so I think you hit the nail on the head there, in that people have seen these TV shows or stage shows, where there's the hypnotist who's clicking their fingers, and everyone falls on the floor. Or they're, you know, we're going to bear their deepest, darkest secrets to the world and misstate hypnosis is great. It's a bit of fun. It's supposed to be entertaining, hypnotherapy, using hypnosis to help is different. Because you can't make somebody do something they don't want to do. Okay? I couldn't hypnotize you, Lesley, and get you to go rob a bank for me.

26:17
Not unless, of course you want to, and I know

26:22
what we do on the weekends,

26:25
you can't make somebody do something that they don't want to do. I, if you bear with me with another metaphor. Now, that little story of your metaphor, I think of hypnosis, as me being your tour guide. So you know, like, if you go on holiday, you might get on a bus, you've booked a trip to go and look at some amazing scenery or some architecture. And you've got some little dude at the front of the bus with his microphone. And he's telling you, right, Lesley, look over here, this building is blah, blah, blah. And look over there, look at this other thing. You've volunteered yourself to go on the trip, you've chosen to find a seat. And you've chosen to pay attention to what that tour guide is telling you. Because you want to learn about whatever it is you're going on a trip for. You've done all of those things, because you want to be there.

27:20
Hypnosis is this thing, I can't just click my fingers, say sleepless knee, you're not going to do that. Because that's not how it works. You need to want to go into hypnosis, when you're working with somebody like me, you need to want to have that desire that actually, I'm ready to let go of that habit of smoking, or that behavior of feeling anxious all of the time.

27:45
I'm your tour guide. And I'm the little dude at the front of the bus, giving you the suggestions and the directions to get you into hypnosis. But to get you to go through the different levels, the depths of hypnosis that will allow you to focus on the things that will make the difference. I don't know the thing that's going to make the most difference for you. But your unconscious does. And that's the difference is that once we get you into hypnosis, which you've done because you want to do your unconscious gets to assume that responsibility and actually do the things it's been trying to do. Instead of screaming at you in new ignoring it. That's essentially what we're doing. We have our gut instincts don't when we think oh, no, can't be that can't be that thing. I'm just going to ignore that I'm being silly. We do those things. That's our gut instinct. That's what we should be listening to. And when we're in hypnosis, we get to bypass that critical faculty that saying, Oh, I'm being silly, it can't be that thing. We bypass all of that. It's like sneaking in the back door, and saying, right, okay, I'm listening. Now, let's, let's do this upgrade, let's do this thing. So that actually when Lesley's out of hypnosis, she's going to feel good about this instead. And that, that's what hypnosis like, is like going on your own personal journey, but inwards of your own awareness to this stuff that we can't quite hear. Wow. I'm sold, Kirsten. I mean, I'm all in Yeah, it's just making that jump, isn't it? And maybe getting across to that we're here on a decluttering podcast. And I'm aware that what we've not spoken about at any point during this podcast, is decluttered. Don't apologize. But I think that it's something that everybody or most people in our decluttering space will be dealing with a some level of anxiety, and nervousness and our body's not quite doing what we want it to do. And so I think that's why I wanted to kind of unpack that and talk about a what it is and how it represents to show people that they're not alone in this journey, and that it is a big part of the decluttering process, and also to give skills and, you know, strategies for people to make those changes so that if a decision that comes upon you when you're decluttering is

30:00
It's difficult if you're feeling that you want to fly. But is it a fight or flight?

30:07
Yeah, if you want to do both of those things, then I think that you know, that you need to be able to take a step back, do a little bit of breathing, you know, we're big advocates of taking time out when it gets too much. You know, as professional organizers working one to one with people, we can read the signs of somebody, typically we can see when somebody is getting anxious or nervous about something. And so but you need to recognize that in yourself take a little bit of time out. And the problem is with decluttering is that people get so wrapped up in the moment and want to carry out carry on making those changes that sometimes they go too far. Then at the end of the process, you think, Well, that was hideous, never want to do that again and again. And so I think it's finding that balance and understanding your own triggers understanding when your body's telling you that you're feeling a little bit anxious and using some of the techniques that Kirstie has spoken about today. With the breathing with the tapping really simple techniques. These are not difficult, but I feel like sometimes it comes across as a bit of a dark heart. And when we're talking about EFT and TFT, or whatever you said it was and yeah, wow, I don't know what that is. And so thank you so much, Kirsty for explaining it. So fantastically. We've loved your metaphors, we've loved your talking about it. I love the calmness in you if only I could be as calm as you absolutely love that. It's been an absolutely brilliant thing to talk about. And I'm so glad it just popped up on my social media feeds a couple of weeks ago and we got the opportunity to meet you and listen to the brilliant stuff that you're talking about. So reminders again, Kirsty where people can find out more about you you do work online, so it's possible for people to to talk to you if they're interested in either, you know, finding out more about some of the techniques that close to use his organs out going down the hypnotherapy route as well. So that would be amazing. And if you do decide to go down that route, if you want to share I'd love to hear the success stories as I'm sure there will be. So Kirsty where can people find out more about you? I have a YouTube channel so it's youtube.com at Kirsty Leach, you can find me there so there's some audios there's some videos where you can watch me doing some techniques and a little bit of stage hypnosis there. If you want to have a laugh.

32:16
You can also just find my website which is boost therapy.co.uk. And there's some free stuff on there too. So, drop a comment on this podcast. If you've enjoyed it, let us know there's gonna be things on our social media channels. So let us know what you thought about today's podcast. Get in touch with Kirsty follow her like her all of those things. And we will see you next time. Thanks so much for listening. Thank you for having me.

32:46
Thanks so much for listening to the declutter hop podcast. Don't forget to subscribe to us in your podcast player so you don't miss an episode. And we'll see you next week.
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Yvonne Hepburn says:

19 January 2024 at 12:48 PM

What a brilliant way you explain hypnosis Kirsty ,thank you so much.
loving this podcast.

Reply
1. Ingrid Jansen says:
  
  19 January 2024 at 3:41 PM
  
  Hi Yvonne, thank you for letting us know you enjoyed this episode. Have a lovely weekend.
  
  Reply
Episode 277 – Techniques to overcome anxiety when decluttering with Kirsty Leitch

Episode 396 – Why Resilience and Decluttering go hand in hand with Lucy Wooldridge

Episode 395 – Don’t Fade by February – Keep Your Decluttering Momentum High

Episode 394 – The Hidden Story Behind a Hoarded Home with guest Eileen Stukane

Episode 393 – How a Clutter-Free Home Strengthens Relationships – A Valentine’s special

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