A graphic of a chair and chaotic desk covered in files for university, piles of paperwork and a computer, with a notice board and a clock on the wall
Episode 154 – Preparing kids’ stuff for Uni

Episode 371 – 10 Areas of Your Home Where the 80/20 Principle of Decluttering is Holding You Back
Episode 370 – Grief and Clutter with Emma Gray
Have you got a child about to leave for University? Things need to be done to prepare for the transition from home to a dorm room or hall of residence. Lesley’s youngest son, Nathan is about to leave so she shares her experiences of the best way to manage the ‘stuff’.
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Transcript of this podcast episode
[00:00:00] Ingrid: Have you got a child about to go off to university for the first time? There are lots of things to be done to prepare them and yourself for this change. Lesley's younger son is about to go to university next week, so she's busy getting things done. And with two children already having gone and finished uni, she's the expert here.

[00:00:22] Now, I must admit, Lesley, I am feeling a bit like a fish out of water.

[00:00:27] I have no university kids. I have no idea what's coming to me, right? 

[00:00:33] Lesley: There's every chance with my child, my youngest child about to go to university that I break down into some kind of uncontrollable, like crying fest. in the middle of the podcast. I warn you in advance because it is quite an emotional time to be fair, but we're here to talk about the practicality.

[00:00:48] So I'm going to try my hardest not to cry. 

[00:00:50] Ingrid: Oh yes. It's your third and last one. They're all fleeing the nest. You're going to be by yourself. Oh my 

[00:00:59] Lesley: gosh. I know well it's not as bad as it could have been because Leah was supposed to be going off wasn't she to teach English in Vietnam and that's not happened because of COVID and lockdown and different things and so at least I'm not a complete empty nester I still have someone here.

[00:01:15] So, and also she does all our declutter hub work so we. We would struggle without her. So yeah, so well done Leah for staying here and not embarking on your lifetime dream. Um, we need you here. So anyway, we're here to talk about university and the things that need to be done before. Before they go and to prepare for life in, let's say a dorm room.

[00:01:39] If you're in the States or Canada, or I don't know what it's called in New Zealand, Australia, or halls of residence that typically are called here. So where they go and live on mass with loads of other people and share kitchens and bedrooms. So we're going to talk about what you need to do before. And we're going to talk about what you need to do to prepare them to.

[00:01:56] Have the right stuff when they get there and not too much stuff, which is the critical part 

[00:02:00] Ingrid: of this. Well, Lesley, you already made me giggle because she said share kitchens and bedrooms instead of kitchens and bathrooms. So I'm like,

[00:02:09] Oh, we are not naive here. Just to say with 

[00:02:12] Lesley: lots of students, it's not my son. Not my son. Anyway. Right. Okay. So let's get started. Let's think about what actually happens when they're about to go. So as an organised person, I'm like, okay, I, I hear you. I'm really sad that you're going, but actually I don't want your room to be a complete tip with tons and tons of stuff that sit here while you're gone.

[00:02:38] And because you can't be bothered to make a decision on what you no longer want and what you no longer want to take with you to university, that that all gets left behind. And so I'm kind of very keen to make sure That we do a proper kind of declutter before he goes. I'm like, he, I said today, I was trying to kind of put it to somebody else, but I'm going to say he, so I will be, I will be doing that very, very soon to make sure that the clothes that are left in his cupboard that he's decided that he doesn't want to bring with him are, are going to have a purpose.

[00:03:09] If he comes back from uni and not just ones that he's decided no longer wants to use. And that's the important thing is that it will leave stuff behind undoubtedly, because he won't be able to take everything with him. It's just not practical for him to take all of his worldly belongings to a university hall of residence.

[00:03:25] But if he makes a decision to leave some stuff behind, whether that's shoes, clothes, stationery, books, whatever that might be, why is he leaving them behind? And do they still serve a useful purpose in his life going forward? 

[00:03:38] Ingrid: So can I then conclude, Lesley, that before he goes off to university, you are going to try and pin him down at some point and go, when are we going to go through your room?

[00:03:50] Or is it something that you're like, no, I'm going to leave him to it, or I think I need to be there and supervise a little bit. I mean, he's 18, you know, I think kids who are that age kind of are. Could be quite messy. So is this something that you will get involved in or are you going to give him just a couple of bags and boxes and go off, you go put everything in it.

[00:04:11] You no longer want, 

[00:04:13] Lesley: um, no, I am not going to leave him to his own devices. And I. Absolutely. We'll get involved because I want the job to actually get done. So pinning him down to be in the house at all, as he's on his summer of fun, it's going to be hard enough as it is. So yeah, I will need to drag him kicking and screaming into his bedroom to get him to do this task.

[00:04:32] I mean, typically, you know, we've had this conversation before in the podcast that I did with my kids. I do declutter with them. Maybe that's because the job that I do. And so they know that I kind of. I'm a useful asset when it comes to that. Um, certainly Nathan and Leah are happy for me to be there. Luke is absolutely not.

[00:04:49] Um, he wants to do it on his own, but yeah, no, I will be there just because I will be thorough if I'm there, it will be a thorough job done. If he's doing it on his own, it'll probably be quite half hearted if I'm truly honest, because he's got better things that he wants to do with his time. 

[00:05:03] Ingrid: Yeah, yeah. So the idea is that you're going to both kind of set a date and a time in the diary, ideally, and then go right, let's look at this room.

[00:05:13] Let's have a go through all of your stuff, your clothes, your shoes, your bedding, your, your desk stationary, all of those things. So we can kind of get a feel for what you have at the moment, what are things that are falling apart, and we're going to filter them out. Yeah. What are things that you're possibly going to take with you?

[00:05:31] So what are the things that need to stay behind here so we can then put them away properly? So the room looks reasonably okay. When you come home over Christmas or a weekend or whenever you're going to come back or show up at some point. 

[00:05:45] Lesley: Yeah, because the, because the reality of university, as much as it's a huge wrench when they go, they're actually only away in this country for about 24 weeks out of 52.

[00:05:54] And so they're home as often as they're away. Do you know what I mean? And of course they can't. They have smallish rooms and so they can't take that much stuff with them. And so they will undoubtedly have stuff left behind, but yeah, so we're going to go through all of that stuff and do a little bit of an inventory as well.

[00:06:12] Work out what's going where we might do some pre packing as well. Get these things. If we know we're definitely taking them, then we can sort of. Start to do some packing. I use those huge bags actually, which is super useful from Ikea. I don't know what they're called actually. Maybe we can, we'll probably find out what they're called and pop that into the show notes, Ingrid.

[00:06:30] But that is huge kind of almost like laundry bags that they have at Ikea that are plastic. They're probably only about maybe five, seven pounds, something like that. And they're super useful because you can just put loads of stuff in and then they're really easy to carry from the car. into their hall of residence.

[00:06:47] And so we will do some pre packing into those bags. I've got those bags already from my, um, all the kids that went, but honestly, one of the most useful things that I did, because if you don't just want to be using, you've got a lot of random stuff. And so you can just took it all in the bag, um, in a very organised way, of course, and then you can schlep it up to the room and it's easier to carry it in that way.

[00:07:07] So that was quite useful as well. And I'm sure there are plenty of other bags, other places, but the ones that I use are from Ikea. Okay. 

[00:07:14] Ingrid: Okay. That's a good 

[00:07:14] Lesley: tip. Golden tip. Yeah. We just need to know what they're called. So you're going to need to go to declutterhub. com forward slash one five four to find the show notes.

[00:07:22] And you'll find what these lovely bags, as long as we can find them and they still exist in IKEA, which I'm hoping that they do, um, in the show notes. So that's today's task. Did you see Ingrid nicely writing it down? Well done. 

[00:07:33] Ingrid: Well done. I know you tell me stuff and I'll write it down and then I'm the one who needs to sort it out.

[00:07:39] So if the bags are not in there, it's probably because I did not find them or, but it is on my list to find this out for you lovely listeners. So hopefully fingers crossed, this is going to happen. Um, what else is important? Lesley, when, when we kind of sort out the home front from when they go to uni.

[00:07:57] Lesley: Yeah. Cause I think we, we also have an opportunity. So we're talking about normal things, clothes, shoes, stationery, et cetera, and packing things that we need to go. Then we've got things that are from that effectively from that

[00:08:14] they've kept from school, what we need to be at this point is right. Okay. Particularly if they've gone through six form, those notes are meted. It's probably a huge lever arch files and big files and whatever, however, they've done that. What are we going to do with this stuff? And do you feel that you're ever going to return to that?

[00:08:29] Now, sentimentally, they may not be ready to get rid of that stuff yet, but we need to have an element of realism, which is right. What are we going to do with it? Are we, are we prepared then to give up the space in your bedroom to keep these notes for now? Or are you absolutely sure that you're never going to use them again so we can get rid of them?

[00:08:48] I mean, we definitely keep them in our house until exam results, exam results have been and gone, just in case, um, a nightmare happens and you need to reset. So it's important to keep them at that stage. But, um, but yeah, you need to look at them because if they're going off to university and doing a completely different course to what they did for the A levels, the chances are they're not going to find them.

[00:09:08] So this is the, this is the point at which. That you can make a very realistic decision and keep the best because that's firmly in their memory. And so they absolutely remember if they wrote an essay that they were super proud of or whatever, and they can ditch the sort of detritus and they can keep the main things.

[00:09:26] So an element of realism with things like course notes and school notes and school books and things like that needs to happen at this stage as well. Okay. All 

[00:09:34] Ingrid: right. Good. Good. Good point. I will take this all on board. I'm listening. I've got my notes here. So, I mean, I've got a couple of years to go still, so, but it's all being put in here, Lesley.

[00:09:45] And I might have to relisten to my own podcast a couple of years time to kind of go, what kind of tips did Lesley give 

[00:09:51] Lesley: us? Do you know what? You could also doing that. Ask 

[00:09:54] Ingrid: me. Yes. I know. 

[00:09:57] Lesley: You could listen to the podcast, but you do have, I am available to you 

[00:10:01] Ingrid: to ask these 

[00:10:02] questions 

[00:10:02] Lesley: I know, that is true. That is true.

[00:10:04] But yeah, you could listen to the podcast. Yeah. Or you could just ask me. Anyway, so those are the kind of things that they need. And the only, the only other thing that I wanted to say in terms of what's in their bedroom now and what goes with them is hangers. So coat hangers. So you kind of almost need to double up.

[00:10:21] Because what happens is. When they move from one place to another. They're not going to bring all the hangers with them. And so you need to have more hangers than you would, if that, does that make sense? So you need to have the flexibility to hang the stuff from uni at home and the stuff from home at uni.

[00:10:38] So you need more hangers than you would. So that's something that you definitely need to buy in advance of going off to uni. 

[00:10:44] Ingrid: So don't you take the hangers with you then the clothes 

[00:10:46] Lesley: on the hangers? Yeah, you could do. But then if you think about it, then they come back at Christmas or Easter or whatever, whenever they come back at the end of term, but they're not going to bring all the stuff on hangers back with them.

[00:10:58] So when you take them, do you see what I mean? So when you take them in the car and you slap them off to uni and you fill the car up, but then at Christmas they may come back on the train or whatever. Yeah. I mean, they might not, you might put them in your car as well. But they're probably not going to, they're probably not going to bring all the hangers back with them.

[00:11:16] So useful tip to have more hangers than you have at the moment. Okay, what 

[00:11:21] Ingrid: we'll do, we'll put, um, a link to our favorite hangers in the show notes as well. Uh, because we, we've, we've got a hanger that we really like, so we'll put them in the show. Let me make a note. Let's see. There we go. Yeah. I'm on it today.

[00:11:36] I'm on it. Hangers in show notes. Got it. Okay. That's a good tip as well. All right. So. Hangers, we've got sorted, plastic bags, we've gone through their clothes, their shoes, all their stuff. I'm assuming there's some tech sorting involved as well, right? Because it changes so quickly and I can kind of envisage these teenagers with all these plugs and things and wires that are kind of outdated somewhere lurking in those cupboards.

[00:12:03] Lesley: Yeah, I think there's definitely, I mean we talked a little bit before about an inventory. There will undoubtedly be additional things that they need when they're no longer living in your house. So that might be. a printer. So, you know, there are possibilities for printing and things like that at university, you can print in the library and all that kind of stuff.

[00:12:20] But I know my kids have found it quite useful to have their own printer in the room. So maybe you might want to get a printer need to make, they normally have all the charges and laptops and computers already, but it might be the time to look at whether that's going to be sensible to get a new one or whether they're going to need it or whatever.

[00:12:35] And so look at what they have already and see whether that's. Fit for purpose. If they're going somewhere different and to a different, you know, certainly in the States and Canada and Australia, they may be going somewhere. The weather is very different to where they live at home. So you might need to look at clothes that are different, you know, big, thick winter coats or swimming costumes.

[00:12:53] If you've gone the other way, you know, whatever that might be, you know, super important to look and at the, what's it going to be like and all their gaps in their wardrobe, in their shoes that need to be fixed. 

[00:13:04] Ingrid: Yes. Good point, Lesley. So of course, one of my favorite things of writing a list is definitely going to be important to see what do I need to buy before they go off?

[00:13:15] What do I need to sort out for them? List writing is involved. So that makes me happy.

[00:13:20] Welcome back. So before, um, we were talking about everything you need to sort out at home for when you get to go to uni, but of course there's a lot of organising to be done. Besides crying a little bit that they're leaving you for when they go to uni, Lesley, tell us what do we need to sort out to make sure they're all sorted on the other end?

[00:13:41] Lesley: Yeah, your emotions need to keep your emotions in check and not be like a crazy quivering Grek when they leave and try and like hold it together. But anyway, aside from that, aside from that, the, the kind of things that you need typically in a university hall of residence in a dorm room, even in a shared house are going to be things where they can containerize.

[00:14:03] And so it's very similar to other organising principles that we teach here at the Deacol to help where you need to have things. orderly. Well, you need to try and have things orderly. You know, you can, but try. Now we're not saying that they're going to do this when they get there, but we say for me, I try my hardest to give them everything that they need to keep things in order when they're there.

[00:14:22] Cause typically dorm rooms, halls of residence rooms, student bedrooms are kind of on the small side. And so you, and you need to fit everything you own into one room. So you don't typically spread out in a house like you do. in your own house. And so it's kind of different. So you're going to need printers in there.

[00:14:38] You're going to need your stationery in there. If you've got a bathroom, your bathroom stuff's going to be in there, your clothes, your towels, your bedding's all going to be concentrated into one room. So you need to use the space really well. Now, luckily Most of the modern student rooms, they've thought about storage.

[00:14:54] And so quite often there is storage under the bed and there's extra storage in bathrooms. They've thought carefully about it. There's a lot of shelf storage, so high shelves that you can put things on, but you need to make sure that you have the things. To put on the shelves, if that makes sense. Again, Ikea, which is absolutely fab for student stuff and it comes at a good price have lots of kind of, I use magazine files all the time to put things in.

[00:15:19] They have little white boxes. I think they're called cubbies. Cougars, Cougars, which is a white plastic range, which is quite timeless, really IKEA. And so you can throw little bits of stationery in because the chances are they're not going to have drawers or they might only have one drawer. So things like that are really, really useful.

[00:15:37] Think about what they're going to need. Printer paper, stationery, medication. They're going to need some kind of medication as well. Maybe plasters, um, toiletries. The bathroom storage is often really limited. So probably going to need a little extra kind of, you know, one of those little plastic drawer units or whatever that you put into a bathroom, you're probably not going to have a bathroom cabinet.

[00:15:58] So it's useful to have one of those standup drawers and things so they can put that, um, toiletries in there, things like that. You might need something for kind of, um. Perfume and perfumes if it's a girl or a boy, in fact, um, but you know, that kind of thing, toiletries, you can put those potentially then in a bedroom because it's quite tight on space.

[00:16:16] So really think about that containerization and make sure that you have that on hand before you go. I, you know, what, what typically happens is in the UK anyways, that they find out. Where they're going to go and what halls they're going to live in or what the student room is going to be like from a photograph.

[00:16:33] So you might at this stage be looking at a photograph and trying to work things out. Look carefully at the room and see, right, there are some shelves up the top. It looks like there's some, some under bed storage. Try and find out. Text the halls of residence. Where is the storage? Is there any under bed storage that can use things like that?

[00:16:49] And then you can sort of start to plan the room out a little bit more. I typically get more than I would need, and then I would take it back. You know, so I'd go down with a lot of storage solutions for them. And then I would, um, bring that back if I didn't need it. Cause they don't want more stuff than they need there.

[00:17:03] And again, I also would bring the plastic bags that I spoke about that are in the show notes. I would bring those back with me. And then when I came to collect them at the end of the year, I would bring those back so that they've got, not got those hanging around in their room as well. So things like that, containerization, using the shelves, really looking at the room, even, you know, some rooms have got a single bed, some have got a three quarter bed, some, some have got a double bed.

[00:17:25] So you need to know that kind of stuff. Before you go. And so things like that are really important to look at those photos, analyze them and see what you need. 

[00:17:33] Ingrid: So can I then conclude Lesley? So in my head, so this is not a completely empty room. There is like a wardrobe, there's a bed, there's a desk there.

[00:17:43] And then what you're talking about is mainly how can you optimize that space so you can fit as many things in there as possible that they want to bring with them. Yes. 

[00:17:54] Lesley: Yeah, definitely. And the 

[00:17:56] Ingrid: bed, I mean, I'm assuming is that there's just a mattress, so you need to bring your own duvets and pillows and comforters and blankets and things like that with you.

[00:18:05] Lesley: Yeah, definitely. Yeah, no, and quite often there is under bed storage. I mean, they're all different. Obviously, every hall of residence is completely different. Some are very big rooms, some are very old fashioned rooms and so, but for the most part. There's a lot of purpose built student bedrooms that have thought about this because obviously it's been done a million times.

[00:18:24] And so I think as well in terms of bedding, um, one of the things that I do with my kids is they will always have friends coming to stay. And so, um, from other universities or whatever their friends from home. So I would throw in an extra pillow and a sleeping bag or something so their friends don't need to bring those with them just so they've got that as extra when they get there.

[00:18:43] So that's something to think about as well. Yeah. And indeed 

[00:18:46] Ingrid: what you're saying, you need to know the size of the bed that's in the room, because if you are assuming it's going to be a single bed, but it ends up being a double, your, your fitted sheets and your, and your duvet is going to be a bit tiny then.

[00:19:01] So it's not going to work. Is it? So you have to 

[00:19:03] Lesley: really think it through. Yeah, you do need to think it through and you need to ask your child because I mean, all my kids for some reason, I think, I can't remember. I think they all had single beds actually, but they all wanted double duvets regardless, you know, so you've got a single sheet and a double duvet because they just want that bigger duvet.

[00:19:16] So, you know, I don't know why. I didn't ask, but anyway, but yeah, that kind of happened. And so, um, so yeah, so things like that as well. So you really need to think that through. You need to think about laundry as well. So typically there will be a laundrette in the student accommodation, but you know, are these students going to be on top of it and doing a load a day?

[00:19:38] No. So you probably need more boxes, pants, you know, those kinds of like underwear type things than you would have. at home. Seems to factor that in as well because they're perhaps not going to do the washing quite as regularly as their mom and dad would do. 

[00:19:54] Ingrid: Yeah. So do you need to bring like a laundry basket and a thing that would be quite handy as well then, wouldn't it?

[00:20:01] Or something where they can put their laundry. 

[00:20:03] Lesley: Yeah, probably a laundry bag, you know, something like that, because obviously they have to walk with this stuff to wherever the laundry is, you know, so that's where the bags also come in really useful, but yeah, definitely a laundry basket needs to go in the room as well.

[00:20:15] Um, and it, so if you can get a laundry basket that has got one of those bags inside it, they're quite useful that they can just pull the bag out and carry that to the laundry. So things like that are quite useful too. Um, I, I, um, give mine shoe racks as well, because there's no, just no space for shoes and my kids.

[00:20:30] like the shoes and trainers and stuff. So I would always put an additional shoe rack in as well. Cause then they're quite cheap, you know, 10 pounds or something. So things like that. 

[00:20:40] Ingrid: So you said they're probably going to have their own room and possibly going to have their own bathroom, but kitchen is.

[00:20:48] Mostly shared, isn't it? So how does that work then? Is there like, I'm assuming there's like a, a fridge and a cooker and things like that in the kitchen, but things like a kettle or a toaster, what can you expect to be there? Or do you need to bring that all 

[00:21:02] Lesley: yourself? Yeah, it's very different depending on, um, the halls.

[00:21:05] And so typically these kitchens will be between for six to 10 people and there is, there will be a cupboard allocated to each student and there's probably two fridges. And so they might get a shelf and they might get a. freezer drawer. And it's, I mean, it's funny when they go, cause they, this is the kind of thing that they fall out about, you know, like who's putting one, who's stealing things out the fridge and who's got more space and all this.

[00:21:28] So it's quite funny, but you know, being the kind of, you know, I've done, I've done this before. Let's say it's why I'm straight into the best cupboard in the place by analyzing I level what's got the biggest space, use the corner, you know? So I'm like, I'm going to get him. I'm going to get the best cupboard in the room because I suppose I know what I'm doing in terms of.

[00:21:48] space. But one of the most important things I would say about kitchen is that we think that they need a frying pan, a milk, you know, a milk pan, a kettle, uh, plates and mugs and all those kinds, which they do, but they don't need it for everybody. So what typically happens is that if the students don't discuss this before them, before they go in together, and of course they tend to be going in blind and not knowing who that they don't know who they're going to share with, they.

[00:22:15] They haven't discussed it. And so these lovely moms and dads bring everything that that child's going to need for like three or four people. And so they're inundated with stuff. So quite often what happens is once they get allocated their accommodation, you know, if they don't know the people that is, and so this is typically in the first year of uni.

[00:22:34] There's like WhatsApp groups and Facebook groups and things where they, they start to work out who they're going to be with. And that's the time to, as well as saying hello and trying to get, be acquainted with your new housemates or flatmates to say, right, let's kind of work out who's going to bring the wooden spoons, who's going to bring the spatulas, who's going to bring the frying pans, all that kind of stuff.

[00:22:53] It's not what they want to discuss. Of course it's not, but it's useful to think about those things in advance, if possible. 

[00:23:00] Ingrid: Okay. That makes sense. So. Not every kid in there brings everything apart from the kitchen sink and the whole kitchen is actually bursting at the seams while they've only got one tiny cupboard each to put a couple of bits in.

[00:23:13] Lesley: Yeah. And of course, you know, the problem that you've got as well is that, you know, they kind of. Encourage their parents to go out and do a big shop for them. So that there, and you want to do that, don't you? And when your kids got off to uni, so you do this big shop, but there's not really that much space to put tons and tons of food in these cupboards.

[00:23:31] And so you've really got to think about, you know, so if it, if it was things like pasta, Then the excess will probably be stored in that room. If you know, things like washing powder and stuff like that is kind of quite a commodity. So typically they will keep that in their student room as well. So these kinds of extra things, so don't buy loads and loads of fresh stuff.

[00:23:49] Cause they are really limited on the space that they've got. And typically everybody does that shot before they get there and then realize this is no space to put anything. And so, you know, you're better off just saying. Well, we'll do a little shop and give you an extra 50 pounds or something to get something next week, rather than go out and spend 150 pounds on everything that they need, you know, I mean, you know, everybody does what they want to do, but these are the things that I have done, the mistakes that I have made and.

[00:24:15] You know, definitely don't get them expensive things because they're going to get smashed. If you're going to get glasses, get thick glasses and not fine glasses because they're going to get smashed. You know, the one thing that I do need a lot of is glasses. I don't know why, but, um, yeah, but yeah, so those are the kinds of things to think about.

[00:24:33] Okay. Okay. 

[00:24:35] Ingrid: Um, what else am I thinking about that? I thought that I need to ask you this. How about things like lighting? I mean, I mean. I'm assuming, do they need some extra light, like a desk lamp or, or is it curtains? Is that all there? How 

[00:24:51] Lesley: does that work? Yeah. Curtains are normally there and blinds and stuff starts normally there, but like any kind of accessories or not.

[00:24:58] So typically in the rooms that I've seen, you know, you, there's a bed with some kind of storage, a wardrobe, a drawer. They might have a bathroom in the room where they might have a shared bathroom. Um, so there is basic stuff like that and a desk obviously, but other than that, you need to provide it. Yeah, 

[00:25:15] Ingrid: so where, so am I'm already thinking at some point they're going to come back over the summer.

[00:25:21] They probably have to leave their holes over the summer. Where do you put all this stuff, Lesley? Because that's going to be a whole carload full of stuff after their first year when they come 

[00:25:29] Lesley: home. Exactly. Exactly. Um, all in my, cause I've kept it from Leah for Nathan. Cause I'm not, I'm not going to go out and buy a load of new stuff, you know, you know, so when I will go out and buy some stuff, but there are things from Leah that she's not using now, which I've kept for Nathan.

[00:25:44] Cause it's, she left a year ago and Nathan goes now. So it's only been a year difference. So it's, I've got a room luckily that I can put everything in, but yeah, so keep that, but, but you have to factor that in that they have stuff that needs to come back, particularly some halls. You have to bring that stuff back every holiday.

[00:26:00] And so sometimes you have, yeah, so some of the, it depends on the way that it works. Some of them, they're only contracted because they use the halls of residence for different things at Christmas and Easter. And so sometimes you have to clear out, which is a right pain. Luckily, my kids didn't have to do that, but yeah, in the summer, if you time it right, they will.

[00:26:17] Typically move on to a student house. And what you then do is pick them up from the halls of residence and move them straight into their student house. So you don't have to bring all that stuff back with you to your house. That's typically what happens, but obviously once they leave, like Leah did and Luke did, then that stuff comes home with you.

[00:26:34] But the charity shops and everything are very good around the universities. You know, they know that the students are leaving and there's going to be loads of good stuff. So they, they, you know, they have collections and things like that as well. So. Okay. 

[00:26:45] Ingrid: So the students themselves can already go, okay, this is now I'm, I'm not going to take this home with me.

[00:26:50] Let me donate it straight away instead of putting it on the car back home and then having to deal with it again. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Oh, that's great for those, um, those charities then, because hopefully, um, some of the stuff it's not very old yet. So if it's been used a little bit sensibly, probably not everything, but some of this stuff can be still in quite good condition.

[00:27:11] So hopefully it can then be resold or used. Yeah, definitely. Okay. So, is there anything else, Lesley, that we need to know? Because I think I'm, I'm feeling I'm kind of getting, yes. Okay. Nothing to panic here. I mean, we've got two more years, so nothing, nothing to worry about just yet, but I'm feeling a little bit calmer now I know all this information.

[00:27:32] Yeah, 

[00:27:32] Lesley: no, not really. Just, just know that the rooms are very plain, um, in terms of the way that they look and so typically you would try and bring something into it to make it look a little bit nicer, maybe some stripes, you know, on the bedding or maybe some cushions, you know, some fairy lights are always nice just to Kind of dress the room a little bit and make it look a little bit more inviting because they spend a lot of time in there.

[00:27:53] And so just things like that from a deco perspective. So, but yeah, and then they just go and then they sit on their little bed and you take a photo and then you leave and then 

[00:28:02] Ingrid: you stop

[00:28:05] basically. 

[00:28:07] Lesley: I want to see my new friends. Bye mom. I go, this is 

[00:28:11] Ingrid: so sad. I don't want you to go. You know what lesson this making me think about when I went to uni back in. the dark ages. I think it was like 1992 or something. I don't remember my mom and dad crying, but maybe they were just being brave and they were crying in the car or something, but I don't remember that.

[00:28:31] But 

[00:28:31] Lesley: I was supposed to be brave. You are supposed to be brave, but I haven't really been very brave,

[00:28:39] Ingrid: you know? And the funny thing is, I do remember from when I went to uni, I mean, my mom. taught me very, very well, like cleaning wise and tidying up and washing up and all of those things. I could not cook. I think I remember, I remember phoning my mom the first two weeks. How long do you need to cook potatoes for?

[00:28:59] How do you need to cook like vegetables for? When can I eat this piece of chicken? Or when should I put it back when it's still raw on the inside? Ingrid, you can't eat it. You're going to get salmonella. I'm like, okay. And this is, and this is me going to a hotel management school, but I couldn't cook.

[00:29:17] Lesley: I don't think there's much, typically there's not much cooking done in what we call Freshers Week here, which is a crazy week of excess for these kids. So, um, and that's looming for Nathan. So that is it. That is all my worldly wisdom about going off to university. So hopefully there's been some tips in there.

[00:29:34] If this is your first time, I know that it will be different. in different parts of the world and depending on what your child is going to and whether they're going into a house or how it all works but that's typically what it looks like in the UK. 

[00:29:49] Ingrid: Well it's very exciting time and what I really hope for the students that they're all going to have a great return to universities from September onwards and have a lot of fun because I think So yes, universities is a study, but definitely a lot of fun needs to be had as well.

[00:30:08] I think that's even more important and kind of not be with mom and dad for a while and sort themselves out and see how they get on in the real world. 

[00:30:17] Lesley: Yeah, exactly. Yeah. And how long it is before. the phone call comes from all money anyway. 

[00:30:24] Ingrid: Well, that is it listeners for this episode. Next week we are actually chatting.

[00:30:29] I'm, I'm very excited about this because I had the lovely opportunity to chat to Chris Lovett about his book, the discovery of less his journey into minimalism. And it is a cracker of a podcast. I absolutely loved recording it with Chris. His book is great. I'm really excited that that's going to be on next week.

[00:30:51] So that's it for now. Thanks for being here. And we'll see you next time.
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