Episode 381 – How to Start That Decluttering Project now you’re retired

Ingrid: So many people tell us I'll finally get around to decluttering when I retire After all it feels like the perfect time more space in your schedule fewer daily pressures and finally the freedom to focus on your home But once retirement arrives the task can suddenly feel huge and overwhelming especially if you're also starting to think about downsizing today's episode we are exploring how to get started when you've been waiting for years how to break your project into manageable steps and how to make it enjoyable along the way

Ingrid: Hello and welcome listeners. I'm Ingrid.

Lesley: And I am Lesley. Now, if you are here for the very first time today, or you've been listening in for ages, we want to say a huge thank you we have a little favour to ask.

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Right Lesley we're talking about decluttering when you're retired now I'm not ready to retire yet but of course you have much more knowledge of this now Steve has retired recently right So we thought it would be a perfect topic to talk about this

Lesley: I know when I was, I was sat with him at lunchtime and I said, recording a podcast today. And I feel like your name's definitely gonna come up and maybe not in a good way. And so who knows what will come out of my mouth? Am I going to, I'm gonna spill all his dirty secrets, but let's just say. I'd love to think that the things we're gonna talk about today would be applicable for my dear husband, but I'm not sure.

I feel like I'm, it's not really, we're talking about people who are like. Chomping at the bit to do the decluttering. When they retire, they're ready. They feel like they've been waiting for years to do this.

Ingrid: Yeah

Lesley: Steve, on the other hand, does not really feel like he's chomping at the bit to do this. He feels like he's gonna continue to put it off until he is like 90.

So, we are a little bit at logger heads, but hey, I feel like I do have a little bit of experience of what retirement looks like, but of course. I'm with you Ingrid. We're here for the long haul for a while yet, aren't we? but it's an interesting shift. You know, it's an interesting shift to see, you know, 'cause not only has Steve retired, he is also come back to Manchester all the time, which is 'cause he's been, if anybody's not picked this up, my husband has worked in London for the past sort of 25, 30 years.

And so he's been absent, let's call it, during the week and. He is been at home weekends and so it's quite the change. Quite the transition in our house at the moment.

Ingrid: Yeah I feel we need to do a deep dive on that off camera at some point last minute We haven't really talked about that yet but let's be honest It is a big change right when you've been working your whole life whether that's part-time or full-time life is full Life is busy Suddenly you retire then you know you've got all you think you've got all this time and it's exactly what you're saying I think a lot of people think I've only got a few more years until I retire and then I will get time to sort out my house Then I'm going to dig in that paperwork then I'm going to sort out my loft or my attic or do all the things that have been on my list for years I'm going to do it when I'm retired We hear it all the time

Lesley: I know exactly, and there are other times, it's not just retirement. You know, people say they're gonna do these things when they're on maternity leave and things like that, or when they have a sabbatical from work. There are many other times when we, Kind of have a little break from the norm, then perhaps, you know, when we think that we're gonna do it, and you know, case in points, we had that enforced upon us in 2020 where lockdown came and everybody was like, this is it.

This is my time, this is what I've been waiting for. Kind of came out the end of it. Some people had great success with it and some people were still in exactly the same position, if not worse than they were with the clutter in their homes. And so it's not a given that time is gonna create opportunities or success.

So let's dig in Ingrid. So why does retirement decluttering feel different? And I think you've already alluded to that really, is that we totally think. We're just gonna have loads of time that we didn't before. But if you've spoken to anybody who, who's retired, they also go, I dunno what I, where I found the time to work.

Do you know what I mean? It's like that sort of idea, isn't it? So once you kind of, I suppose you just chill a little bit, don't you? And this is what exactly what you should be doing. Like we are not like, okay, crack the whip and off you go. Absolutely not. This is about. Taking your foot off the gas a little bit and giving yourself a little bit of time to breathe, enjoying what you've got at home, enjoying your time, being able to do different things.

You know, this is what this is all about, right? And so really, really important. But is having more time then after retirement, a myth.

Ingrid: yes I do think so I think we we all have like our bucket list our things we're going to do when we retire So we want to cram in all of the fun stuff We wanna do all the things that we maybe never could do whether it's Going for walks with a walking club or joining a hobby or seeing your friends for a coffee that you could never do on a Wednesday morning at 10 o'clock You know what I mean So I think you've got that on the one hand and I think it's also when you Retire you suddenly are like you you are out of the structure right You because you're so used to getting up at the same time and you think oh I'm just gonna have a lay in today and I'm gonna relax and I got plenty of time to do all of this but And I think you you just want to do things a bit at a slower pace So I think it's a combination of things and I think you'll because you have more time you think oh I'll do that tomorrow I'll look at it next week because of course when you work and when you've got very limited free time around work and sleeping and Doing breakfast and lunch and dinner and washing up and laundry really have to be almost focused with that time you've got like a whole diary you can easily go but don't feel like it today I'll do that tomorrow or the day after tomorrow or after the weekend whew Another week's gone Poof another month's gone And before you know it you're like wow I've been retired for six months I've had all these plans Done anything how is that possible I have so much more time now

Lesley: I think you're so right, Ingrid. I think that retirement definitely does give you that freedom, but it takes away that structure that we used to, and you have to rebuild a whole new. Way of doing things, don't you? Like you just have your day changes and that can be a good thing. It should be a good thing because we,

Ingrid: Yeah

Lesley: remove that structure that we've tried so desperately to get out of, or not as the case may be.

Not everybody wants to retire, but some people, it's not something that they look forward to, but for many it is. And then I think, but having more time in some ways can make things. Feel harder, not easier. You know, you've got more time. So therefore you don't focus on what's in front of you. And certainly in a decluttering journey, the time then hemorrhages, hemorrhages away.

So what we need to do is to. To find that balance. I think we need to find the balance. We need to try and replace that work routine with some kind of purposeful, intentional decluttering tasks or a like, almost like a rhythm, like a decluttering rhythm, you know? And that might be 10 minutes a day, it might be two hours a day, it might be one day a week, it might be three days a week, you know, and you've gotta work out what's, what's gonna be right for you, don't you, within this change in what you do every day.

Ingrid: Yeah I think so too And I think also I think if you've been putting off something for a very long time Lesley and you suddenly have all the time you might just freeze a little bit and go oh okay I am here now and I've got all this time but now I'm actually Don't know what I'm doing I dunno where to start first And it feels all a little bit overwhelming because I suddenly see all the projects that I didn't finish or that they didn't start over the last five 10 years maybe a bit longer And then that overwhelm kick in and maybe you people might get frozen a bit

Lesley: Yeah, definitely. And I think, I think on top of that, you know, it feels overwhelming. You know, it feels overwhelming because you've waited for a long time. You know, it feels like, oh, right, okay, I kinda waited till now and now it's here, and I have to, in principle, start to take action.

Ingrid: Yeah

Lesley: that a lifetime of possessions, if this is something that, that you've put off, you know, then.

You've got a lot more stuff to deal with potentially as well, you know, so we need to think about that. So, and that's emotionally kind of weighs down on you, doesn't it? And I think it's also, you know, we, we need to remember that this is quite a sentimental time for us. You know, this is us going through a huge.

Huge transition. Yeah. This is what we've done. Most of us have done this. Some people have done this since they were 16 years old and then all of a sudden become 60. Some people early retires. No, no age on this. We're not saying, but in general, people start working the kind of teens, early twenties and continue into the sixties for the most part.

That's a long time that we've been doing the same thing. Right. And so I think that it. It's normal that we feel differently, that we feel that that transition is also a difficult one to work through, and we need to recognize that within our decluttering journey, don't we?

Ingrid: Yeah absolutely And I think it's also Lesley on top of that as well I think When you retire you're probably when you're indeed in your sixties of us if we've had if we had kids our kids by that time probably have moved out have possibly got their own flat whether renting or buying or living somewhere else So you might then suddenly go around and go wow now it's just me or the two of us left in this house and we're rattling around What are we going to what are we doing with all this space it's a lot to upkeep the inside of the house the outside of the house the gardens all of those things Are we still in the right sized house So I think in combination with Retiring and all of the things that come with it you all I think a lot of people also ask themselves the question do I wanna stay in this house Whether it's a big house or a small house is this the right location for me Is this the right place for me and do I want to make changes and could I possibly downsize to a smaller house This is something that I want and wow But if that is possibly something that we're considering It's not only about going through the stuff but it's also really thinking what's important for me and what do I want to keep And when you're downsizing more stuff than normal will probably have to go because you will have a lot less space So lots going on actually

Lesley: You know, and just related to that downsizing thing, of course it might not just be a sudden revelation that what, you know, you're 65 and you wanna downsize. It might be something that you've been waiting to do, the decluttering to allow you to downsize. And so

Ingrid: Yep

Lesley: like doubly stacked, isn't it? You know, people put it off like, I couldn't possibly move right now because I've got too much stuff that I need to work through.

And so. The stakes are high, you know, the stakes are high, and we've gotta work all of this stuff out. And so I think the actual process of decluttering is no different when you are retired or when you are. 25, 35, 45, 55. It's the same, right? No difference at all in the process. So everything that we ordinarily teach you to do is what you need to do.

It's your mindset that's different. It's the time scales that are different. It's that shift in thinking that's got to be different. So please don't think that. Decluttering in retirement is any different to any normal time. It's just that you've gotta work it out. You've gotta work out how am I gonna get this done?

And also really, really important to. Enjoy, not just go, right. Okay. I've come out of a 40 year job now. What I gotta do is a 40 year job of decluttering the house. You know, you retired because you want time to do fun stuff. Right. And so you need to find that balance. Yeah. It's not just like. You not just going to replace one job for another job.

Right. And so that's why I'm being extra especially nice to my husband at the moment and trying to allow him time to enjoy life when actually we've got stuff piled in every room. Not in every room, just in his own little rooms, the rest of the house. Fine, by the way, just in case we're wondering. but yeah, so I'm really, really trying my hardest to allow balance, do you know what I mean?

But I'm not gonna lie, it's quite tricky. But anyway, so that's it. So that's, that balance is super, super important. So downsizing might add that urgency, but we think, you know, a lot of people are thinking about this not just in retirement, but in the fifties and sixties and, you know, and I wonder whether sometimes there's just something that happens that makes that.

You want to kind of almost be in control of downsizing. I think that's, it's a nice thing to, to be able to make your own decisions about when that happens and do it for the right reasons and for positive reasons, rather than be forced into that by something, you know, a health issue or a financial issue or whatever that might be.

So to be in control of it and to kind of, you know, create your own destiny is quite a nice thing as well. So, yeah, it's, it is not easy, is it? But the decluttering is the same that much we must. Stress right.

Ingrid: Yeah Yeah think really helpful to see it that way as well because I think that will help you to go okay Yes it's hard It's not hard because I'm retired It's because I have to make lots of decisions and I feel that overwhelm and I have to go through a lifetime of belongings or and of course there's a lot of stuff probably in the house that's connected to your work life as well that suddenly it's like superfluous So maybe It is work wear you always used to wear and that as a work blouse or a work trouser We hear it all the time don't we Oh I used to wear that to work but And that gives an extra layer I think on top of it that can make it tricky But it's the same as somebody who had maybe love still wearing their maternity clothing or uh, jeans from when they were in their teens same emotions So it's not because you're retired and it's harder it's just emotions that sit behind it that you need to get to grips with and understand

Lesley: Yeah, we need to understand that if that was a very special time, you know, we talk about retirement. Many people hopefully have had a very fulfilled, you know, long career that they've enjoyed for the most part, where there's always gonna be tough times, isn't there? And it's not something that they necessarily want to let go of, but it's something that makes sense to let go of it's time.

Do you know? So it's more that kind of thing. and I think that if it has been a very happy time in your life, as you're rightly saying, which you know, it's about. You know, recognizing which parts of that are going to be sentimental, are gonna represent that time well, you can't keep everything, you know, it's coming to that realization that actually you no longer need those course notes or conference notes that you took and you've, you've kept for years that you no longer need those books that are all about the topic to do with your job or whatever.

And of course you're gonna keep some probably, but you don't need to keep all, but you know, letting go of that, breaking through, that barrier of letting go is hard. You know? And we need to recognize that as well. And that will probably be a phased approach.

why don't we go for a break? We basically, people who are retired like, why this is so hard?

Ingrid and Lesley are like, oh, this is like really hard stuff. So let's go for a break and let's come back and let's give some light at the end of the tunnel, shall we? Ingrid?

Ingrid: Definitely

Hi everyone Welcome back After your break We are talking about decluttering when you're retired and that it can be tricky but of course it wouldn't be our podcast if we wouldn't give you some really practical advice as well So how are you going to do this How are you gonna make a success of decluttering when you're retired

Lesley: As we said, it's no different to any other type of decluttering Ingrid really. but let's give some pointers. You know, we've done three hundred and seventy, three hundred eighty podcasts now on this, so there's loads of stuff that you about general, general, decluttering that you need to go back on.

Something that we can't cover in 10 minutes, but I think it's really important in order to kind of get that balance to just. Break it down. Don't go like full blown decluttering. 'cause what's gonna happen is you are gonna burn out quickly. And so you need to do things slowly, methodically. You need to make a plan.

So within your planning thing, right? Okay, so I wanna do all the things that I've also been putting off till retirement, all the fun stuff. I wanna make sure I've got time to see people, to go to the clubs, to go for walks, to look after my health, to do all, all of the things. Whatever floats your boat and.

Whatever you fancy to doing in retirement, you need to create time for that. You know, so what I would do is I would plan out, you know, plan out your weeks and go, right, okay, I have no structure in my week at the moment. There might be things that you've already got in there that you've got commitments for.

So what does my week look like? How many hours have I got in that week available to me? What do I want to allocate my time to? I think it's really important to break it down, to give yourself a realistic. Kind of overarching view of what a week might look like. 'cause if you've got, right, I wanna spend some time with my grandchildren.

I pick them up from school three days a week. I want to go to a gardening club or choir or whatever that is. Put those hours of time and, and put them on some kind of planner and go, these are all the things. And then look at that and go. Where's the time for decluttering in this and what makes sense now, I would suggest that really, you know, you, you don't wanna be doing any more than kind of five hours a week, I would say, in grid to get this balance right.

You know, you don't wanna be spending loads and loads of time. Now, we've said many times in this podcast before that when we are working with clients. We very, very rarely do them more, more than one or maximum two sessions a week. Because of the decision fatigue, because of the physical difficulties with decluttering, it can get really tedious really quickly if you do too much too soon, and so pace it out properly.

So I would suggest if you are going from this kind of, you know, working eight hours a day and you're just gonna think, well, I'm just gonna replace that eight hours a day that I went to work with. Stuff, and I've got four hours a day that I can do decluttering. We would advise for you not to do that, but we would advise for you to schedule time in because if you don't, the time will just hemorrhage away.

So you need to be realistic about what your week look like, looks like, and where there are potential gaps, and then ideally commit to those gaps for decluttering time. Yeah. Yeah.

Ingrid: Yeah I think it's really important to set those those goals you need to have that plan You need to break it down and go Okay so I want to do my bathroom that's the next thing on my list what areas are there in my bathroom and under the sink cupboard maybe you've got a separate cupboard Maybe there's bathroom art in another cupboard or room and just go right Today I'm going to do the under the sick cupboard and tomorrow I'm gonna schedule an hour to look at the products that are elsewhere in the house and the day after I'm gonna look at the bathroom cupboard that has also the towels break it down into small manageable chunks Work your way make a little list so you can tick it off And that I think can really help you to go right because we always forget everything that we have done but we berate ourselves for everything that we haven't done So making it just a tiny little list What can really help you to go actually a I have been doing stuff I have been scheduling it in and this is what I did then And then you can keep a log for yourself as well and you will soon enough find out Okay Wow I did manage I did schedule in five times an hour but Which one did I then not do And actually I oh I've only done two hours Wow Where has the other three hours gone And then you can start to evaluate some of the things like what happened Why is this happening and make little tweaks and go maybe I put the wrong time of day that hour Maybe I'm better in the morning or better in the afternoon Because then things like energy come in as well Lesley

Lesley: Absolutely. Do you know what Ingrid? I'm going to, I'm going to go, go for it and say what I think the absolute best thing that you can do. If you are retired and you've got time, and this is a commitment that you want to make, that you want to equal to your house, come and join our membership. Honestly, come and join our membership.

It's literally the perfect time for you to come and to spend small amounts of times to think about planning, to think about energy, to think about a process structure, to get the support, you know, to, to go through those struggles, to connect with other people that are retired and not, not everybody in the membership is retired, but there are many, of course.

And to find out those kind of things. And importantly to do it within a community because you are used to a community typically at work where you can bounce ideas off people and all that kind of stuff. And if all of a sudden you come and, and life is a little bit more solitary, might not be, 'cause you've got friends and all those people, but you know, at home it's gonna be more solitary perhaps than you're used to if you've been working in an office or a shop or whatever.

And so. Think about joining our membership, honestly, because it, it could, and honestly, Ingrid, it wouldn't, isn't it perfect? It's for that, for all of the things that we're talking about. And then you don't have to do it alone. You know? You don't have to work these things out that we're talking about. You just come in and we've got all the answers and the structure and the accountability, and we've got some incredible new stuff in the membership at the moment that we're rolling out as we speak.

And so. You know, it is a great time to join, isn't it? And don't wait until 2026. Do it now. Start working on it now. You know, don't go, oh, you know, that'll be a 2026 project. 2026. Well, 2026 will come. but you know, don't procrastinate. Get cracking now. Start small, start slow, you know.

Ingrid: Yeah

Lesley: just wanted, as you were saying, I'm like, why are we not saying to people come and join the membership?

Because like, literally, it's the best. idea ever. But anyway,

Ingrid: you know

Lesley: let's continue.

Ingrid: it's no but no Can I just say one thing Lesley It was so funny So I spoke to a a lady today on a discovery call So she's she reached out to us and said I would love to know a little bit more about the membership so you can book a call with me so she was telling her us her struggles and the things that she needs help with and if we have in the membership what she needs And I had full-hearted go yes we have the accountability sessions we have an opportunity to ask us questions There are amazing people in our membership We've got such an amazing community with the nicest people And I actually said to her I said you know what like the membership is like the best thing And then I kinda said to her I actually say that of something that I like run with Lesley of our own things and she's

Lesley: If we don't believe in it, no one's gonna, are they? But anyway. Yeah.

Ingrid: But we it's so good and sometimes we feel a bit like oh yeah like typically a with a Lesley like not tooting our own horn but going Hey I just but it's brilliant isn't it It's so

Lesley: Yeah.

Ingrid: And our members love it

Lesley: Yeah, definitely. I think it, it ticks so many boxes, do you know what I mean? It ticks so many boxes for community, for fun, for, you know, for structure and all that kind of stuff. So, yeah. So we digress. But yeah, we just scrap this whole podcast, scrap the whole podcast, don't bother listening. And all you need to do is, is click buy the membership and you're all sorted.

I'm joking, right? Yeah. right. Okay. So I think, yeah, so we've talked a little bit about breaking it down, about really looking at your schedule and working out how you can fit this time in and then committing, you know, we talked to a, a, a lot about scheduling time in your diary to actually declutter.

Super, super important. But then we've already spoken about this. I think it's really important. To get that balance right. Don't let decluttering become your new full-time job. That's not what we want for you. We need to have that fun. We need to have that time to do the things that we wanted to do. And I think it's so important to also intersperse your progress with celebrating the success that you've got.

So as you are making progress as you are, you know, I've done my kitchen, I've got rid of 10 bags, whatever it is, you know, different things make different people take and and celebrate successes. And you can see that on our Wednesday. Wednesday there are. So many different types of win on there in our Facebook group that is.

And so, but celebrate those successes and give yourself time to celebrate those successes because you have got time now so you can go, do you know what, if I managed to get that kitchen done, I'm gonna take myself out for a nice walk and I'm gonna have a, cappuccino at the end of it. Do you know what I mean?

You've got time for that without rushing from one thing to another thing to another thing. And that's what's lovely about this. You can just take a deep breath and just go, okay, I've got time. How am I gonna use this time effectively?

Ingrid: Yeah definitely And that's what we want for you because I think you well deserved after working for so many years to also enjoy it and do to some some of the things that you want to do But of course we have to also say You slow down This is not something that you have to rush You do have a little bit more time as well and you have time to think things through and you have time to go Actually I want to make sure that I you have time now to drop the items off at the charity shop You have time to consider All the things that are involved with decluttering and Organising which is so nice because we want you to do this slowly but surely but thoroughly and we want you to take your time We want you to be able to safely do this and to make sure that you don't create lots of piles everywhere that then become trip hazards You have to think about these things so slowly but surely does it

Lesley: Absolutely. So anyway, before we finish, I feel like I need to share. I'm gonna out my husband for something that I did. So you know, as well as I do that anybody that listens to this podcast, anybody in the membership that will like start in an easy place first and don't be way laid by things that I, sentimental, photographs, all of those kind of things.

They come at the end of the roadmap. They come at the end. Yeah. So Steve's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm gonna go, go, go up and do something. I'm like. What are you doing like that? Why are you not in your cupboard sorting your clothes out that are like bursting at the seams? Do you know what he was doing?

Stamps. Stamps? I, I, I can't on in the first week stamps, he's had them, so these stamps, he got first day covers for the kids when they were around a year. 1999 they started and 2009 they stopped. He got a first day cover every month for two of the kids, only two. 'cause Nathan wasn't even born then, but he's just kept in the boxes for all that time, not done anything with them.

So he decided it was a really great time to sort out the stamps for the kids. I'm like. I don't think that's what I really want you to be doing. Like I, you know, so his, what he wants to do and what I want him to do are two very different things, but I'm like, stamps are at the end of the roadmap, the end of the roadmap.

Have you read my book? You know, I mean, I was like this, so, and then I have to take a step back and go. Let him have time to have a nice time and balance. And he is been happy doing his stamps for the kids. So yeah, so that's what I've got to content with. So I mean, spent half an hour talking to you about how it should be done.

Definitely don't do what my husband's doing 'cause he is not got it sorted at all. Yeah. And that's it. That's all we've got in retirement, isn't it?

Ingrid: I know it's it is hard isn't it Because he probably thought I like I wanna do a project that I wanna do He doesn't wanna ever do what you wanna do doesn't wanna do what you wanna do Lesley And so that it's close He wants to do what he wants to do because he hasn't had time for 30 years

Lesley: Exactly. I just like, I just, I fear the worst. I feel like I'm gonna be, we're gonna be episode 471 or whatever, and I'm still gonna be like, I really wish that Steve would do some decluttering. But anyway, at least I'm practicing what I preach. I'm not decluttering other people's stuff. That is one of our number one rules, and I've never declared a single thing of his, even though it's.

The most tempting thing in the entire world, let me tell you. But anyway, so, that's all we've got. Is it Ingrid

Ingrid: feel for you I feel for you both I feel for Steve because he's got like Task Master Lesley like walking behind him with go and do your clothes and then I feel for you because you're like oh my gosh He's like back from London after 30 years and now we see it all the time

Lesley: doing his stamps?

Ingrid: what I wanna do Oh my gosh

Lesley: Exactly. Exactly. But anyway, so yeah, there we go.

Ingrid: Good luck with that Good luck with that Anyways listeners we hope we give you some food for thought So basically don't put off your decluttering until you're retired That's also a message

Lesley: Yeah.

Ingrid: a lot earlier You don't have to wait until you're retired but if you're like looking at this and going oh yeah I'm gonna retire next year You can already come into the membership now and do lots of the learning and put some of these ideas and mindset changes in place because don't keep putting it off because not gonna be able to do all of this within a month's time anyway This is gonna take time This is gonna Knowledge and accountability and motivation and you need a lovely supportive community So definitely check out our membership on Members Declutterhub.com We'll put all of the information in the show notes as well and I really would love for you to think okay This podcast has made me think what how How does my week look I'm retired now What Where does the time go Where does it get filtered away Do I actually plan in time for decluttering and Organising or do I need to look at my scheduling go actually I'm gonna build that in Tell us We would love to hear from you Leave us a comment in the show notes Send us an email Leave us on our on on YouTube because we would love to hear from you What in this podcast has really made you go wow I need to work on that That's what I need to do We would love to know and then we will see you next week