A photo of a woman - Jo Jacob - wearing a pink top holding some coathangers, smiling into camera

Episode 302 – How to downsize your home with guest Jo Jacob

Moving house is considered one of the most stressful things to do in people’s lives, but it can be even harder when you’re downsizing from a large house into a smaller property. It’s not just the decluttering of your things, but also the enormous impact leaving a family home can have. In this podcast we chat with guest Jo Jacob, a Professional Organiser, who helps elderly clients downsize into retirement apartments.

Prefer to read rather than listen?

Transcript of this podcast episode

00:00
Moving house is considered to be one of the most stressful things to do in people's lives. But it can be even harder when you're downsizing from a large house into a smaller property. Not only the decluttering of your stuff, but the emotions connected to leaving your home have a huge impact. But we have great news because today we have a fantastic guest lovely friend and colleague Jo Jacob, who helps elderly people downsize into retirement apartments.

00:34
You're listening to the declutter hub podcast, bringing you tried and tested no nonsense tips and advice from the leading experts in decluttering and organizing your home. Now here's your host, Lesley Spellman.

00:56
Hello, and welcome, listeners. I'm Lesley, we're delighted you're here to join us as part of your decluttering journey. So whether you're brand new today or have been listening in for ages, we want to say thank you so much for being here. It means so much to Ingrid and I that you turn up every week to listen to and supporters. While we talk all things decluttering and organizing. We'd love to help more people with their quest for a clutter free home and our podcast is a fantastic way for people to be inspired to take action, we have a favor to ask. If you like what you hear, be sure to hit the follow subscribe or like button on your podcast player. share us with your friends, or share your thoughts on the podcast by leaving a review. Welcome, Jo, back to our podcast. Now you have been on our podcast before Mojo, right. Five years ago did we say?

01:43
I know it was about photographic organizing then. So yeah, it's a long time ago. So lovely to lovely to be back. Thank you for having me.

01:51
I know it's something we're talking about. You know, it's been a while since we've talked about downsizing on the podcast. And we know you work a lot with it senior move partnership that you work a lot with. And so tell us a little bit about that and what you do.

02:04
So basically, I've been a professional organiser for a very long time now already. And prior to starting with the senior move Partnership, which was about seven years ago, I was helping people, you know, helping them stage their homes for sale and helping with moving. But moving into alongside the senior move partnership has really specialized in moving people into retirement apartments, where the developers pay the senior move partnership or for a certain amount of package hours that they would get a specialist like us and to go in and that could be going on literally six hours where we try to work our magic in six hours or up to managing the entire move for so just sort of really enjoying specializing in that and the whole kind of mindset of of moving and downsizing and what that entails really. And

02:58
it must be really nice thing for them to have an you know, obviously people, anybody can get professional organisers home at any point with any kind of moves, whether that's a move into a retirement property or a downsize earlier in life. But I think to have that as part of your package. And so you've got this thing without even thinking about needing it or wanting it. It's just so fabulous. And so what do you think are the benefits of downsizing? And so you've done a lot of downsizing your time with people across all walks of life. So why are people downsizing? Do you think it's increasing more? Is it just when people are trying to get equity out of their home? How's it all working? And what are the benefits,

03:35
there are various reasons that I come across where people are downsizing, it can be a health reason that they need to move to, you know, it's mainly needed to move to a smaller property, which obviously, we're just what downsizing is. So it could be health benefits, or health requirements. It could be a bereavement, or just a geography change, they need to be closer to you know, a more supportive family member or something like that. And also, you know, these large houses, they just become, you know, there's a lot of hard work involved in maintaining a large home. And I think a lot of times people want to move to sort of preempt that I cannot tell you how many homes I've walked into. And a typical home would be it's four or five bedroom, there's a double garage, there's two sheds full of holes, and there's an attic and they've raised their families, they've had grandchildren who come you know, but now it's just that the gardens too much. There's just too much staff or there's been a bereavement and they just think now we need to move but you sit in one of these sort of large homes and you look at the floor plan or the one to bed department. And it literally is where do we start and that's when we walk in and with a plan or you know, I come in and this is how we do it and it's you know it it does feel overwhelming for them. But, you know, my role is just to make that like, this is the plan of action. This is how we're going to do it. And I'm here to support you. And it's, it's all doable. I've moved a lady who had eight acres of land, I can't tell you how many outbuildings two kitchens and seven bedrooms, and I moved her into a two bedroom apartment, within 30 hours, if I can do that I can move anyone as far as I can.

05:34
And that's really interesting, because that must have been. So what we're going to do really with this podcast is we're going to because there's two sides to this, there's the practical side of things, which is really about space and management of stuff. But then there's a huge part that comes before that waste, which is the emotional wrench of moving away from a home that you've had, for decades, probably, you know, as you say, that grief might come into it bereavement might come into it, there might be circumstances that that mean, there's a need for you to actually move. These are all big emotional poles, because some of these decisions are not necessarily yours. Like often when we're moving house, we're making the decision to right size to go across ways to go upwards to you know, all of these things, but downsizing is a different thing. So it might be something that is certainly something that a lot of people welcome. Of course it is. But it's some people are going to be a little bit nervous about that process. I know. It's interesting, really, as well, because my mom died like 19 years ago. And she and my dad lived in a kind of not a large house, but just like a three bed house. And my dad wanted to move from where they lived over to be near me. And so an area's just a little bit more expensive than where he was. And so he didn't have a choice, he had to go into a retirement property, because that's all that he could afford. And I think at the time, he was kind of maybe 60, or something like that. But now he's the oldest person in his retirement property, because they've taken the parameters down to 55, which scares me a lot. If I'm honest, being a 55 year old, that there's a thought that I might go into a retirement property. So that's interested in itself as well that people at 55 and making the decision to downsize as well. And obviously, there in the UK retirement properties are typically much more cost effective than standard flats, aren't they, Jo? So I think that's really interesting as well. But let's, let's talk let's dig into that a little bit. Let's talk about your lady. I mean, I don't want you to go into details, because that's her personal, you know, information. But how did you manage the emotional side of moving somebody from such a large property, with potentially so much stuff that went along with that into such a small place?

07:44
That one was slightly easier because she was very ready, she had four children, but literally scattered around the world, I think she had to in the UK, but not nearby the rest of the world, Australia and America, she was ready, her husband was in a care home. So she wanted to move to the same sense of time apart and the care home was stalled. So for her, I don't know if it was a monetary reason. I don't, you know, ask sort of too many personal questions. But she, she was ready to go. But she was totally Natalie overwhelmed. Because, you know, the volume of items, you know, and I can never really show that I felt overwhelmed, but I remember just driving home and thinking, right? This is gonna be a challenge. You know, you've got you've got two kitchens, because the house was so large, there are two kitchens, and, you know, so you just have to take everything back and just step down and break down the process. So once they're involved in that, then the emotion doesn't seem so overwhelming when they're obviously involved in all the choices, you know, when we're not just coming in and saying, Well, that's not going to fit, well, that's not going to work, we're gonna get house, clarinets come in and just take it all away in front of you, you know, it's never, it's never like that. It's always a very, very supportive role. It's also very interesting when there are family involved because often, it's almost like I feel like a little bit of a referee, because you'll have mainly the daughter and the mum, sort of clashing. Come on Mum, you don't need you don't need that you'll What what are you taught, and then the mum gets defensive, she doesn't want to be told, you know, so I'm kind of like, why don't you go upstairs and have a look at them, then then and I'll just carry on the kitchen with your mom, because I am emotionally detached. It's not my parent, obviously. And I can kind of, you know, stop with that flashing because that's a real barrier, as well. The you know, the people that are downsizing, they don't really want to be told nine times out of 10 they maybe don't want to be working at don't want to be moving and they don't want to feel that this is all being put upon them and they have to do it a certain way. So it's just kind of talking them through the process, but really understanding that it is a wrench, but it's mainly then talking nothing but the benefits of it, you know, there won't be a big garden to maintain, there won't be possibly the stairs to worry about think of the community that you're going to be, you know, moving to, or if they're moving not to retirement apartment, but then moving to just a smaller home, but to be their family, then think of all that, you know, the extra time you're going to have with grandchildren or anything like that. So it's really focusing on that on the positive side there.

10:35
And there are many, many positives and you know, just talk about my, my, my father in law that my dad, you know, just moved him he's in a bungalow, sort of a dormer bungalow, and we've just moved him downstairs into downstairs bathroom and bedroom for similar reasons, you know, his mobility is impaired. But just that movement, you know, it's ready for him to adjust to another week, I just one of the week says, just I mean, it's just, it's an emotional wrench to admit to yourself and those around you that this is something that you can no longer do, which is, you know, it's really hard. It's something that needs to be dealt with carefully. And so it's great that, you know, we as professional organisers can be emotionally detached from that, and steer things in the right direction. Because, you know, family members often are more about the practicalities of the side of things, of course, they understand the emotional side of it. That's not what I'm saying. But when the when it comes down to it, and time's up against it, you know, you're up against time, then it is going to be like we need to get this done, because you've got to move in two weeks, or whatever that isn't. So time pressure. And we're used to that sort of stuff as professionals. So it's definitely worth getting a third party involved, I would say that downsize if possible. And I wanted to talk a little about a bit about how do people understand that? How do you get across the kind of volume side of things, I think one of the things that I've always done when I've been working with people downsize, and it's not just elderly people, you know, we're talking a lot about elderly people here, because that's just experience at the moment, they've done more work with them, retirees, more recently. But in some ways, downsizing takes away some of the decision making, in my opinion, because you can't make a decision to keep something because it just does not fit. And so you know, where you stay in your home and it belongs in your home and the home is not changing? It was there before. So in principle, it can stay afterwards, if need be, but when downsizing that's not the case, how do you go about that kind of spatial side of things, and understanding the restrictions on space.

12:35
So the thing that works, the best is to create a floor plan, I have stuff where you know, on my laptop, and I get the floor plan of either the new house or the new apartment and and then measure their furniture. It's incredibly powerful, you know? Yes, I can see right now that you have, you know, a drawing room, you have a snug you have a dining room with, you know, eight chairs around a new posted. Hon. You know, all these Chris not hundreds of prison sieve, but all these Christmases. But, you know, in your new place, of course, you won't have to worry about that it's focusing on those on those positives there. Because for them, they're like, well, I need 10 Pyrex dishes. And I need a huge dining table because I've always hosted Christmas and it's sort of that accepting of looking at the floor plan, okay, well, we can fit a tee a smaller table with four chairs in, you know, I had, I had a lady that was moving to one bedrooms, and she was adamant, she was going to take three sofas and I did it on the floor plan aims to show her that that's blocking up a door. And this is going to look like a doctor's waiting room, you know, with these, you know, all these sofas and to sort of to convince her, you know, well, they're not going to fit. And of course, when you do have visitors, you can go down to the lounge in the area, or you can go out to a restaurant and not worry about posting. And it's like focusing on all the all the benefits of it. But it's really creating that floor plan. And when they see you know, yes, I understand that right now you'd have 10 small tables with lamps on all around your home. But let's get one in the hallway so that in the winter, you can always leave a light on if you're you know, out. And then let's have one in the living room and then one over here but you don't need 10 and also 10 aren't going to fit so therefore that leads to which your favorite whiles and I put them on the floor plan and then it that automatically creates an inventory of items to I always say move on and not dispose, because the word dispose is quite upsetting to people obviously. So let's let's like Where should we where are these items going to go? And that creates then the next stage of downsizing but number one is the floor plan and once they visually see their bedroom Okay, so I can get the two chests of drawers on a bedside table, it's got a fitted wardrobe then. Okay, that's what I'm taking from the bedroom. So the three spare bedrooms and all of the bedding and all of that, that that goes on the inventory that, that it's not been taken.

15:16
Right? And so and that also makes perfect sense, of course, and do you but I can still see, people are people. And even though you're saying that with the best of intentions and putting a very positive spin on things, which is the right way to go, that you're still gonna get resistance. So how do you then deal with that resistance? Is it something that does the stuff go with with them to the property, and then they realize it themselves? And then there's a kind of second phase of decluttering? So how do you how do you deal with the resistance that may come?

15:49
When that when there is resistance, then yes, it's a question of saying, if it was something smallish, like even down to a chair, and I would be like, right? Well, I don't think it's going to fit and be easy to walk around, or I don't, I just don't think it's going to fit however, you are going to be opening your doors and you know, it will be okay, I just think it's going to be tight. So something like that, I will always say I would rather you take it, and then you decide when you're there. But if it's down to it, I had an ad saying lady actually about the three sofas, and the removal team phoned me the next day, and they just said, Jo, you know, it's propped up on its side, because it would not fit and I and on so I let them the retirement place know that, you know, she would then need to get house clearance out to take this, take this old sofa because it was not safe. But sometimes they have to, they have to decide that themselves. I will create the furniture in the floor plan. And I will then just drag it out of the plan to say, if you would like to take that that's where where do you see this going? Because if they can then realize themselves that it's actually not physically going to fit then that, you know, that becomes a little bit a little bit easier, though. And I think the

17:05
problem is as well that for a lot of people Jo is is you know, we as professional organisers, and many other people out there have got a good idea and can visualize spaces, you know, in situ. So we can walk into a room and we can see where there are potential problems, we can see where there is storage lacking, we can see where things have not been optimized or furniture is too big, but many people can't. And that's the problem is that it's not that easy for everybody to visualize. You know, and particularly we talk a lot about clutter blindness and things like that if people have seen these things in their rooms and things like that, for a long time, it can be hard to make that mental shift, can it because we've just not got the tools to be able to do that. So it is an emotional wrench. It is difficult, it will be easy. If you've got someone alongside you, that's a professional. And I think that it's important to talk about what do you do if you can't have a professional and you are have got your son or daughter? What steps would you take? I mean, I mean, for me, it's very much about opening up a conversation. And it's all about the communication, isn't it? Whether it's a downsize, whether it's all of those things, you know, we deal with family quite a lot in any kind of decluttering situation and and it can become difficult because of there may be resentment built up people do families are doing what they do with exactly for the right reasons all of the time. But there's so much history that goes along with that. So if someone was about to think, right, I need to downsize myself, I'm going to downsize from a four bedroom property into a two bedroom flat, you know, how do they go about that themselves?

18:41
So yes, I mean, I've written a blog on that it's on my website, actually about you know, how to downsize. And just another thing as well as I have a free, a free ebook. And it's that this is actually about starting the conversation. So just as she was saying, you know, how to the the five hurdles, the five big hurdles and how to overcome them. So it's the reasons that, you know, they might not want to downsize, but they need to, and just some ideas on how to overcome them.

19:07
It's all such fantastic information, Jo, and but what I want to do, I want to go to a little break, and then after the break, I want to come back and talk about what do you do if you've not got somebody like Jo to help you through this process? So uh, welcome back, everybody. I hope you enjoyed the first part of this podcast. And now we're going to talk about what do you do when you've not got a professional organiser to help you? How do you go through the process of downsizing to make sure that you can avoid some of the pitfalls that Jo was talking about? So Jo, how do you do that? If you've not got Jo next to you, because this is not easy. You know, it's easy to say, you know, we've got somebody there and you can talk about all the things you've got the spatial awareness, all of these things, but what do you do you do it alone?

19:49
So number one is I think the biggest hurdle is having the conversation with parents or elderly loved ones that you may be Need to support to move but they have their objections against it. So I do have an ebook, which is totally free. And it's all about the sort of the five big hurdles, and then how to overcome them. So having that conversation, and then it really leads into the practical side of it. I have a blog on my website regarding this. But there are different there's the whole process of how to help people. So number one, it is creating a floor plan, because once you start with a floor plan, and that leads to a list of the items that they are going to take with them when my inlaws moved through a big house down by the beach in Bournemouth and they moved to a smaller home, I say smaller home, it was still four bedrooms and everything but my mother in law, she just famously said to me, you know, are we need to downsize the house is too big, and then I'm sort of going around the house. But then and then she said, Oh, but I still want the same number of rooms the same size. And unlike it's not really downsizing is that you've got you've got to we've got to take less thing or so it creates like an inventory of then the items that you are not going to take with you. Because you're already then know what you are going to take with you. And a huge thing that I always say to people is once you know so say for example, you are going to be taking a bookcase that has you know drawers at the bottom. And then shelves at the top or a display cabinet or something you know, something like that is it's currently full of at crystal glasses that aren't used or have been used, but they're just in there to display. But you've also got a built in bookcase that has books that you're wanting to take with you, then it's a question of right let's get the glasses out, let's keep poor glasses that are your favorite glasses or to a beach, something like that. And then pack those up to get to auction house or charity. And then let's build the item that you are taking with you with items from your home that you want to take and then it they have a place to go. My thing that I will always say to people is where is that going to go? And that just starts this conversation. You're constantly thinking, you know, go, where is this going to go have a look at the new kitchen? Do you need 10 Pyrex dishes? Can you fit the men in your new lifestyle, which maybe isn't going to be hosting for, you know, the family of 10 people. So it triggers that so then it goes on to the inventory. And then the elite through to that is what comes out to auction house as income make you some money? What will your buyer maybe be prepared to buy from you or have from you that saves you disposing of it ie fridge freezers, the white goods, garden machinery, anything like that, then it goes to charity. Because they will come and collect loads of you know charities do these amazing things. And as long as you've got enough notice they'll come and collect them. And then my last resort is house clearance because that is chargeable but things like that aren't fire, haven't got fire labels on old mattresses or items in an attic or you know, in a in a garage. But just do be prepared that house clearance is is an emotional thing. And I would never ever recommend that the client is that when house clearance are are going in, especially if we're talking about downsizing. But this is also linked to the whole process of this is linked with people that are sending a family home after a bereavement. Yes. And I know if they're sadly firsthand, you know, I lost both my parents within two years of each other. And during a just a minor pandemic had to sell my family home with no charity shops open. And literally my heart was broken. And I was told by this amazing gentleman, the house parents guide just not to be there. And so I didn't get to actually see it. And that stayed with me, every client that I see, I just know you do not want to see something that you have used and loved, you know, going out with House clearance, because charities won't take it on first of all, John,

24:21
I'm so sorry that you had to go through that. That's mean losing two parents and the pandemic in such short proximity is really hard. And, you know, obviously that was your job to go through that because you were a professional. But just to know that even you found that house clearance side of things very difficult as well, you know, because this is something that you're very, very used to and so that's really, really good advice. I want to kind of unpack a couple of things that you talked about really so which really resonated with me which was you're talking about using the floor plan as a kind of guide and saying okay, so in principle this cat this furniture has got with you This dresser or this shelf unit or whatever is going with you. So what we need to do is we need to take the things that are going to fit into that unit. And we need to make sure that we have disposed of the things that were no longer 110 and make sure that they fit in the shelf unit. And so I think that's a really good piece of advice as well. So it's not just imagining that something might fit, you actually have to do the work in almost like a jigsaw puzzle and go, is this actually going to fit in in the new property? So you have to almost reinstate it as it's going to be in the new house in the old house before you move? I'm understanding that right. Yeah,

25:34
absolutely. People, you know, are leaving, built in units and saying, Well, I'm taking all of those books, and I'm like, fantastic. Where are they going to go? Yeah, you know, have you are you having built in units, you know, fitted in your new apartment or your new home? And if so, then we'll mark up all of these books to be stored somewhere else until you have that otherwise, you're going to have 20 boxes that you you can't unpack because there is nowhere for them to go. So it's always thinking ahead. Yeah, and I think it's

26:04
very similar principle to what we spoke about many times on the podcast before about when people get a new kitchen, or when people get new wardrobes fitted, as you know, look at each individual component is in each individual drawer or cupboard and go, what's going to fit in that what have I got at the moment? How many glasses have I got? How many shelves of glasses have I got? And where is that going to fit in the new configuration if you complete the change, because many people completely change the configuration of their kitchens when they're getting them refitted. And so it's really important to think about that, that's where it goes down to quite a granular detail out of organization and trying to get it is like a jigsaw puzzle, isn't it job to try and get everything to fit in? I think that's really, really helpful. And then to go down that route of, right. Okay, so we're gonna go for kind of making money out of the stuff, if there's anything, you know, that's worth having, like auction houses and all that kind of stuff, or selling it on eBay or vintage or whatever. And then your next level was remind me, I

27:04
said, so the buyer as well, you know, yes, I had a gentleman had a sort of small bungalow, and it was this huge corner plot. And he had a ride on mower to lawn mowers, garden, bench gardens, that and everything. And he was kind of like, I don't know what to do with all of this. So I contacted the estate agent on his behalf and said, you know, is the buyer interested? And I think he got, you know, hundreds of pounds, to be able to delete everything, my client was happy, and I was over the moon, because that was like, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, done, you know, as a solicitor because money is changing hands then but because it went through the agent, the estate agent, then it was sorted. So it's always worth asking the buyer, you know, white goods. A lot of times clients will just say to me, Oh, I was just going to leave that. I'm like, No, we you know, you can't just leave items, because that can come back to sort of bite you where it has to it has to be a breed that that is being no that is being left. You can't just leave it. Yeah, the

28:07
principles are exactly the same right across the world in terms of the way this works, but just to in the States, and I'm pretty sure Canada then there are other things that you know, we've got a state sales which happened, which don't typically happen here in the UK, we've got garage sales. We're here we have car boots. So sales, which we kind of as professional organisers try and avoid a little bit if possible, but I think a Garrow said it was a different piece entirely, because that's on your property. And that's much more straightforward. And you can run out of out of your garage, obviously. And so just to add into the mix, that that's going to be a possibility in other areas of the world. But we typically don't do those kinds of things here in the UK. And I want to talk about moved. So we talked a lot about the sort of planning side of things and, you know, blah plan, trying to make things fit. We talked about the emotional side of things. We've talked about the family side of things, which all of these things are probably 80% of the actual move to be fair. And then we've got the practicalities, you talked before about House clearance, you talked about the movers. So what how do you how do you how does the day go to that? How does that we'll move to a go when you're helping somebody to downsize. So

29:19
once you've got removal Saturdays, you're gonna get an idea of the timescales. And also, of course, we have to know, in the UK, whether it's waiting for completion, you know, there's no point being ready at 9am If you can't actually get in until, you know, 2pm I literally last week spent three hours on someone's driveway because they booked me from a certain time and they didn't complete for three more hours. So you don't have to be aware of the timescales. And every single case is you know, it can be different. So if it's a big move, I would recommend either hotel or you know, a guest suite if it's a retirement apartment, just to you know, protect to protect the person that we're not Getting into two o'clock, then you know, in three hours, I can always get like a bed made and a bathroom sorted and majority of the kitchen unpacked, but apart from that, it can take sort of eight hours to unpack, into, you know, an average, you know, one two bed apartment or or a smaller home. So it's prioritizing, you know, what the timings are where the person's going to be lots and lots of lots of top tips, I mean, take anything valuable with you take medication, ideally, get your bedding strip, you know, have three and bedding ready to go, that it goes in York their car or or my car, so that when I get there, and then the bed is ready, you know, is unloaded and you're looking at, you know, 30 boxes piled up and going brilliant, which ones the bedding in, you know, for the beds that have that kind of already. And that just allow a lot of time, I cannot tell you a kitchen takes so long to unpack when it's been packed by removal companies, because there is so much paperwork involved in you know, it really does, it takes a long time, or what are just jumping back slightly, we're talking about planning everything, a kitchen as a huge thing to sort of to plan and you were mentioning that as well as lead. But I would always have either have photographs or a video of the kitchen and I do a plan or post it you know, I'm five foot seven and right handed. If I'm unpacking someone who's five foot three left handed their kitchen is going to be very different to how they want it. But I always emphasize this is your kitchen. Where do you want your kettle? Where do you want your glasses and mugs. And sometimes people will just say, I'll just put it wherever I change it round the work involved in taking tea mugs and glasses out and then moving it like I always say plan it in advance so that you really know and that of course does help trigger the decluttering process. Because you might have 60 mugs now which 10 of them are sentimental. Well, they'll say 60s sentimental, but probably 10 or sentimental. And then but there's only one shelf for them. So you know, where are they going to go plow that mob tree to have up in the counter that kind of thing. But so just then when you come to unpack a kitchen already have an idea of where it's going to go everything else really okay if your kitchen and bathroom and mainly your bed are okay, then everything can then wait another day or if you've got more family support coming in. Yeah, so

32:34
obviously Jo, you've already mentioned before, you've got an e book about downsize and you've got a blog about downsizing, I want to also highlight the we've got a moving house checklist, which is for general house moving, which has got all of the things that you need to do. And we also did a move in house podcast as well back in the day, we'll add we'll link all of these in the show notes because some great ideas, some of the similar things to what Jo has been mentioned as well. Things to, to think about. But more than anything, I think that there's an additional, we talked about the front of front end of the podcast that, you know, moving house is one of the most stressful things still up there in the top three of the most stressful things that you ever do. And that is absolutely the truth. But once you start to put in, you add into that, that you're not upsizing and start in your life and there's this element of for some people that it's a negative thing or something that they don't necessarily want or something that they know they have to do but they're not quite ready. It really does add a lot of emotional turmoil into the thing and so if you can get somebody else to help you along that process to support you through it, then it's so so important to get yourself out of that if you can get some little on pack if you can get family to unpack kitchen cupboards for you do it and if it needs a little bit of tweaking, even though it does take time, but don't be involved in every step of the process if you can avoid it because it's so emotionally draining isn't it? Jo is these are the hardest days that we do as professional organisers as well, aren't they, Jo? You know, we go in we can declutter and organise homes all day long, but a house move is a long, laborious hard day emotionally and physically for us, isn't it?

34:10
Absolutely. Absolutely. And it's normally it's just so emotional for them depending on their you know, on their journey but it's still a wrench if they've left a long term family home. You know that is that is a wrench I always help them on Move Day and sort of say do you want to be the last to leave? You know, do you want to be the you know, walk around your home have we got photographs you know, we're taking all the memories with us. If you want me to go drop the key off or sometimes they want to be the one to leave and I will then whisk the vacuum cleaner around to the Lego do the key. You know it's really protecting them if clients are moving to like a retirement department then normally they're amazing and they will let him bite them you know somewhere to go and you know have tea and cake and other residents will come and see them and I love that side of it because then when they come back in it or Do that looks like their home, but it is that items that they've already chosen to go in. And if they're involved in a lot of the process, and like where the kitchen, how the kitchen is going to be, or you know where their bed is going to be, then they then see that and then it's like that positive aspect of the move rather than, Oh, it's so sad, you've left your, your left your home, it's always the positive of all for the move, and then less maintenance and look at the lovely garden, you can now see from your window without any maintenance whatsoever that you've now got to do. So.

35:34
Yeah, and I think I think that's where I'd like to finish really, Jo, because, you know, we've talked about that it is difficult, and we need to, you know, we need to respect that it's a difficult process for many people. But it's a really positive process after and so I don't know anybody, whether that's my father in law, my dad, and many, many clients that I've worked with that have downsized into a smaller home or into a retirement property that have regretted that move, because it's been the right time for them to do that. And as we talked about with with standard decluttering, things have to be right for you and your current lifestyle, you know, everything that we're doing in the decluttering organizing world is all about what we're doing to represent the life that we want to lead today. And downsize into a smaller property fulfills that in many, many ways. So whilst we've said it's difficult, and we talked about all the pitfalls, and how hard it is, and how emotionally wrenching, honestly, it's a really, really positive move for so many people and one that people like me, people like Jo, who does much more of this, and everyday, absolutely love to be involved in, you know, being a part of that next step on someone's life. So, Jo, thank you so much. It's been amazing to get into you. As always, we could talk all day as always, and but yeah, I just wanted to anything else you want to add to before we go

36:49
on. Now, as I say, early I just mentioned about if it's a due to bereavement, it is still the same process. It's just, it's, it can be even more of a wrench to just to really recognize that. But then the positive of that is that's the end of that chapter. And then normally they're benefiting with, you know, some income or so then be positive about what they can do with that. But it's still the same steps, just not going to a new a new home, sadly, but now, it's been lovely. I totally love libre, I've moved hundreds of people into retirement apartments or downsize into smaller homes. And I often go back and see them. And not once has anyone regretted it. And normally, they're just so busy. They're out and about in a whole new community and just absolutely loving it. So I think you know, I think it's fantastic. It's it's hard to make that to make that leap. And to think it's just so overwhelming. But actually, when it's broken down into stages, it's totally and utterly doable. And it's all for the right reasons. So I absolutely love what I do. I love being able to support people through this, that this stage of their lives. Fantastic.

37:59
So before we go as well, Jo does not just do downsides. It's just some really cool stuff. And Jo's got an incredible social media. So she gives fantastic hints and tips on Instagram. She's got a fantastic Facebook page, she's got a brand new group. So there's loads of great stuff on Jo's socials, which we're gonna link to, obviously, she's talked already about an ebook. She's talked about her blog. So do go and take a look. Because it's not just, you know, even if you're not thinking about downsizing, Jo is a fantastic person to follow. I learned something new every day when I follow and think why did we not think of that? But anyway, on that thing, we're gonna put all that into the show notes. So Jo, in a nutshell, tell us the best place for people to find you.

38:41
So best place is bonilla.co.uk. It's BD en Ben is my son and Ella is my daughter. So bonilla.co.uk and everything is on that thought for links.

38:53
Perfect. So listeners, are you thinking about downsizing? And as this podcast helped you to get your head around what to expect? We would love to hear from you in the comments in our Facebook group on YouTube. So thank you so much for listening, and we'll see you next time.

39:15
Thanks so much for listening to the declutter hop podcast. Don't forget to subscribe to us in your podcast player so you don't miss an episode. And we'll see you next week.

Subscribe now so you don't miss an episode

Listen on

Apple Podcasts

Listen on

Amazon Music

Listen on

Spotify

Watch on

YouTube

Prefer to watch rather than listen? Watch on YouTube

Want to delve deeper? Read this blog by our guest Jo Jacob - How to downsize to a smaller home.

How to downsize to a smaller home

There are so many reasons why it is so hard to imagine how you or your loved ones would downsize.

- A lifetime of memories
- Families raised in the house
- Friends nearby and a sense of community

However there are often many reasons why for many, downsizing does need to happen.

- Ill health
- Bereavement
- Financial
- Retirement
- To be closer to family

A question I am often asked is "when should elderly parents downsize?" There is normally a trigger like one of the above, but it is still hard for any person to admit they cannot manage, that they need to leave the area or that the house is too big.

Having helped 100's of clients downsize, my biggest advice is not to leave it too late. Move when they are active enough to make new friends, build a new community and enjoy their new (smaller) home.

I have been helping clients move to retirement apartments for many years now, other client move to smaller home and also support families who have to sell their parent's homes following their death.

This hits hard for me as I learnt first hand about this when my parents passed away within 2 years of each other and I had to clear and sell my beloved family home during the pandemic.

If you are reading this as you are selling a family home after a bereavement, then points 2-4 apply. I also send you my love at such a difficult time!

Here are my top tips to make the downsizing process easier

Make a floor plan

Using a floor plan of the new home or apartment, measure out furniture that you would like to take. Mark where it would go. Seeing it on a plan of the new home helps you to imagine what their new home would look like and also help to understand, that although currently there are 2 reception rooms, a dining room and spare bedrooms, the same furniture will not fit into the new home.

Once you have a fairly confirmed idea of what furniture and contents will be moving, arrange 3 x removal surveys and if budgets allow, include packing. This gives you a good idea on cost and also keeps options open for move date availability. I would always try to avoid moving on last Friday of the month!

Create an inventory of items to be moved on

By knowing what is being taking to new home, you then have a list of items not being taken. This helps the task of disposing of items become more manageable.

You can note whether an item is going to family, an auction house for sale, if the buyer is purchasing/keeping it, being donated to charity or if house clearance need to take it.

Declutter

Visiting the new home and seeing the smaller kitchen may spur on the decluttering of 50+ mugs, numerous Pyrex dishes from many large Sunday lunches hosted in the past and countless ornaments that have space now, but won't in the new downsized home. When decluttering, ensuring you have an exit plan for items is the easiest way to get the job done. Dealing with sentimental items can be very challenging, ensure your loved one feels heard, items are preserved correctly and not discarded causing upset.

Change of address

Once a move date has been confirmed, get all household files and start to go through a checklist of all companies to be notified of new address. Many can be done online. Set up the appropriate phone/broadband, council tax and other utilities for the new property.

Move day

Having already had removal surveys done, you will already know if it is a 1 or 2 day move and what the timings are likely to be. Ensure as much as possible is organised in advance. Cleaning, where keys are going to be taken, journey to new home etc.

I always recommend taking medication, important documents, a clean bedding set and some kitchen items in the car so that you can settle your relative in without having to also unpack boxes straight away.

Consider booking a hotel or the guest suite of the retirement complex if that will be easier for your elderly loved one.

In conclusion

Starting the conversation, dealing with family dynamics, bereavement
and the task of a major life change for your loved ones is a difficult time. Going through these processes will make it easier and ultimately conclude with your senior loved ones settled into their new home for the next stage of their life.

Find out more about our membership by clicking below

A photograph of Lesley and Ingrid at a laptop smiling into the camera with words advertising the declutter hub membership on the right

Useful Links and Resources

Subscribe now so you don't miss an episode

Listen on

Apple Podcasts

Listen on

Amazon Music

Listen on

Spotify

Watch on

YouTube

Recent Posts

Episode 314 – How to declutter a storage unit with Margie

Episode 313 – My decluttering journey with Christina Rudes

Episode 312 – 10 clutter hotspots and how to fix them

Episode 311 – How to declutter when everything in your home feels sentimental

Page [tcb_pagination_current_page] of [tcb_pagination_total_pages]

First

Last

Episode 302 – How to downsize your home with guest Jo Jacob

How to downsize to a smaller home

Here are my top tips to make the downsizing process easier

Make a floor plan

Create an inventory of items to be moved on

Declutter

Change of address

Move day

In conclusion

Episode 314 – How to declutter a storage unit with Margie

Episode 313 – My decluttering journey with Christina Rudes

Episode 312 – 10 clutter hotspots and how to fix them

Episode 311 – How to declutter when everything in your home feels sentimental

Leave a Reply

categories

want to get started right away?